News0 min ago
Family Relations
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My husband and I were both widowed. We met after our spouses deaths, and fell in love. His daughter is 30 and married. They are very cold to me. I’m generally thought of as a nice person, so I don’t understand their attitude. They invited my husband to a party, 8 hours from our home. I was not invited. Is it okay if I avoid them in the future?
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I’m new here, so I don’t know how to respond to individual comments. My husband and I have been together almost 4 years. His daughter is his only child. I have none. He buries his head in the sand regarding any of her flaws. He wants to spend time with her anytime she calls. He “doesn’t see” the conflict, is totally oblivious to the fact that she has never made eye contact with me…
When a new partner comes on the scene, acceptance is often difficult for children from the first union - regardless of age.
But absence of acceptance should never mean absence of good manners and respect.
Were I in that situation, I would tell my daugher that no-one will ever replace her mother, and no-one is trying to do so.
Nonetheless my new partner is my choice, and I expect the same level of respect for her that you show to me, and if you are unable to do that, then we are going to have difficulty moving forward.
I am not asking you to accept her as your 'new mother', but I am asking you to accept her as the woman I love, and I expect you to employ the manners and courtesy I raised you to have, to be civil in her company.
If you think that is too much to ask, then we are going to have to have a very very difficult conversation about where we go from here.
But absence of acceptance should never mean absence of good manners and respect.
Were I in that situation, I would tell my daugher that no-one will ever replace her mother, and no-one is trying to do so.
Nonetheless my new partner is my choice, and I expect the same level of respect for her that you show to me, and if you are unable to do that, then we are going to have difficulty moving forward.
I am not asking you to accept her as your 'new mother', but I am asking you to accept her as the woman I love, and I expect you to employ the manners and courtesy I raised you to have, to be civil in her company.
If you think that is too much to ask, then we are going to have to have a very very difficult conversation about where we go from here.
How do you know you were not invited? Were you specifically told not to go? If that was the case, your husband should have made it clear that if he goes. you go, and if that's not acceptable, then he will decline the invitation. Your OH going on his own is a complete lack of respect for you and is putting the feelings of his daughter above yours.
If you are happy for your OH to go see his daughter without you, then that's perfectly fine, you accept he wants to see her, but you have no need to socialise with her at all.
If you are happy for your OH to go see his daughter without you, then that's perfectly fine, you accept he wants to see her, but you have no need to socialise with her at all.
Sqad - // This is an easy one...............you accept and respect my partner or our father /daughter relationship disappears. //
It may be the end of the situation, but I would never ever say that it was 'easy'.
I rejected my mother and sisters because they would not accept the woman I loved, but it was not easy.
It may be the end of the situation, but I would never ever say that it was 'easy'.
I rejected my mother and sisters because they would not accept the woman I loved, but it was not easy.