love with cousin!! pleae help!!!

[zack12]

hi i falll in love with my nearest cousin. when we meet we holding our hands. when we are watching movie i touch her body parts like lips,waist,hips,massage on her back, and she allows me to do this. she never stop me.she stop me one time when i put my hand under her pantie and when i try to massage her underarm. i love her and i think she love me because she allows me to touching her. should i have to tell her i love u?? please help. i am 16 and she is 18. and i am not want to marry her. i just want her for life that no one will know. but how can i ask her to do that?? will she accept me??

[4getmenot]

oh god You didn�t need to be so explicit. I know its not against the law but to me doing anything to your cousin is sick. Surely somewhere down the line there is the same blood. Eeeeuggggh. Go on marry her and have a baby with two heads.

[someone56789]

that is really sick, but if your cousin allows you then i think she likes you. or maybe she is lonely and lieks the attention ... its still sick though!!

[Le Chat]

There is nothing sick or wrong with cousins as partners and there is no greater chance of foetal abnormalities or genetic mutations than in any other relationship. What is sick is the horrid description of zack fumbling about with his cousin and her knickers (and his bad grammar!)

[4getmenot]

there may not be in your eyes but I just think of it as my cousin has my nans blood in them and I do, so its just sick to me

[someone56789]

and me, i think of my male cousins as my brothers ... yuck!

[Goodsoulette]

I agree with you 4get. I have some handsome cousins but I have never ever thought about them inappropriately. I dont know where people get the no greater risk of abnormalities, of course there is.

The absolute risk to first cousins having a child with a recessive genetic condition is about three in every 100 births, unless they have a family history of an autosomal recessive disorder, in which case the risk may be higher. When we also include the background risk of having a child with any type of congenital or genetic disorder, which applies in every pregnancy, the overall risk to first cousins rises to about six in every 100 births, i.e. double the risk in the general population. The great majority of pregnancies do not result in abnormalities.

[leewayne]

You just automatically know not to go there,its your cousin.How would your other siblings feel if they knew about this?? I think your young and a bit nieve.Dont do it,its wrong!!!!!

[redcrx]

Le Chat,
if there are no great risks of abnormalities then why do midwives ask if the mother and father are cousins when they book a pregnant woman in? There must be some reason and not just for a bit of gossip.

Zack,
I suggest you try and find a girl thats not your cousin, perhaps you are mistaking a close relative with an adult relationship. You are not very old and maybe havnt had much of a chance to experience going out with girls of your own age.
and yes, we didnt need the full details, its just quite creepy.

[bednobs]

you'll have to ask her if she will accept you - noone else will know that, especially not random internet strangers. personally, if it is nt against the law for cousins to have a relationship, i believe noone else has the right to tell you it's right or wrong, it will ust have to be on how you both feel about it. Just remember, if the relationship ends or goes wrong, it will have more ramifications for you than if it were someone outside of your family (who you presumably never have to see again if you dont want to)

[4getmenot]

I dont know about anyone else but why the hell is massaging someones underarm a turn on

[confused79]

maybe he was trying to get to her boobies! lol

[4getmenot]

I;m sure if he was he would have told us. lol

[saxy_jag]

OK. Zack, yes, I think you have been a little graphic here. Doesn't matter whether this is a cousin or not, it's more than most people like to know about. Next time just keep it to the bare bones - she likes you, she lets you touch/kiss her intimately. Doesn't have to be any more descriptive than that, babe.

Now to the problem in hand. Since you and she already seem very close, why not talk to her about you feel. She may feel the same, she may not. If she doesn't, then you should at least be able to work things out and not fall out over it. If she does, well that's great.

For centuries, cousins from all cultures have married. Some will tell you it's wrong, because that's how they've been brought up, and I guess that's why you're asking the question in the first place. Others (like me and Le Chat) are able to be a little more open-minded about things. If you continue in this relationship, then as long it's what you both want, and as long as it's legal where you live, it has nothing to do with anyone else, and good luck to both of you.

[johnlambert]

This is a wind up
right?

[saxy_jag]

It may be, it may not. But just in case it's not, I usually give my honest opinion.

[DaddyBear]

It's understandable for a boy of your age to become besotted by someone who shows you a bit of sexually charged attention. Thinking you'll want to spend the rest of your life with ANYONE at your age, never mind your cousin, is a little silly. I think she's enjoying leading you on, getting a little kick from giving you these urges. If you get the opportunity I heartily recommend that you do everything you can to have sex with her. It seems that the relationship that you have is doomed for failure but at least you'll get your willy wet. A guy can never have too many notches on the bedpost. Remember it'll be a one-off as well so get really experimental.

[Le Chat]

That was a yukky answer from DaddyBear!
Although I see nothing wrong in cousins getting it on, I am repulsed by the thought of getting it on with any of my cousins .. of course. I don't think of them 'like that' - that's not to say that other people feel the same ie zack12 and thousands upon thousands of previous generations, who never left the small world of their immediate village. It was really quite normal then.
redcrx - I have 2 children and on neither occasion prior to birth was I or my husband asked if we were related! Maybe it's different in Southport!

[Goodsoulette]

Well its standard booking in questions under at least four different health authorities.
I think you would be an absolute fool to have a child with your cousin without taking up genetic counselling.

[redcrx]

perhaps southport is different then Le Chat because I have a child and it was on my booking in form, because of possible risks. I also know of two other health authorities that ask the same question so my reply wasnt completely without foundation.

[Shadow Man]

Wrong wrong wrong wrong. Did I say it was wrong.

This thing only happens in Wales and is wrong.

So wrong in fact that serious consideration was given to changing the law re the recent Sexual Offences Act 2003. They amended sex with your grandmother, now making it illegal, and although sex with first cousins was not amended it made The House of Lords, and was believed to be only thwarted due to the Royal connection and keeping a blue bloodline.

Avoid your urges and find a nice girl who is not related. Under no circumstances have sex with her. When it is over, you will no doubt attend family weddings and funerals etc.

How embarrassing will it be?

She's your cousin for God's sake!!!!