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Non-religious funerals

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stoo_pid | 18:04 Wed 17th Nov 2004 | Body & Soul
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Now, I'm not planning on going for quite a while yet, but I was wondering if anyone knew what options there are for non-religious funeral services. 

I've been to plenty of civil weddings but all the funerals I've been to so far have all had vicars running the show. When (if..!) I go I would not want that but of course it's all too late to tell anyone by then.  I know my family could hold the service themselves but it doesn't seem fair to ask them.  Anyone know of any organisations that exist to do all the formal stuff?
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your friendly neighbourhood undertaker will be able to organise any type of funeral you want - the last none religious one i went to was organised like this, it took place at the crematorium (not sure about the license for burial outside church grounds but understand it is possible if you prefer), they had a hall with no religious paraphanalia or symbols and a contact of the undertakers lead a remeberance / celebration of John's life - it was a very pleasant event with friends and family telling a few stories and talking of all the peoples lives john had touched over the years... we all then went to Johns local and had many many toasts to the good man.

Just asked my sister - she works as a funeral arranger. Any funeral director will arrange this for you, you tell them that you'd like a Humanist funeral.
you can have a cremation and get friends and family to run the service..or you could approach your local spiritualist church and ask them to do you a nice spiritual reading without the god stuff..or go for a pagan funeral contact the pagan society just do a search for that and they will definately be able to help you..also you will have to leave it in writing what you want otherwise at emotional times like your death .you will have everyone bickering over what to do..and at times like those you may end up with a vicar..as that is what the relations will do just to be normal.also choose your songs or music you want playing..if any..or else you will end up with abide with me or the lords my sheperd ..perish the thought,,i have also told my family i want no hymns..or sermons...or else i will come back and haunt them...mullein
I have had similar thoughts and came up with the following ideas what what could be done, placed in order of cost:

1. Space funeral service. Rocket carrying ashes takes you into space where you orbit for several years until you burn up in the atmosphere. http://www.celestis.com
2. Cryonic Suspension just before you snuff it. http://www.cryonics.org
3. Mummified and placed in your own pyramid
4. Shipped out to New Orleans for a traditional voodoo ceremony
5. Placed in a wooden crate embossed with Mr Flad Dracula, placed on a boat in Whitby bound for Romania.
6. Dropped from a helicopter into a volcano
7. Fly to Tibet for Zoroastrian style ceremony, with your body left out in the sun to be eaten by birds and your bones used in a Buddhist statuary
8. Put into a large bottle with an obituary note and cast out to sea.
9. Recycled as pet food with your obituary on every tin
10. For men leaving wives behind, Southern Indian style double funeral, where you are burnt twice and the widow has s$xual intercourse with her husband's close friends as a rite to re-enter the flow of normal life
11. Used as a Guy Faulkes on a family bonfire
12. For the dedicated drinker a Bontok tribe funeral where your corpse is sat up and friends and family pour alcohol into your mouth to aid your decomposition
13. Placed in your wheelie bin

I think the Humanist society, in London, have a booklet about non-religious ceremonies you can get for a few pounds.  I think they are in WC1 or thereabouts.

My family know I do not want a religious ceremony.  I want a cardboard coffin and my ashes scattered in a Woodland crematorium in Norfolk where they plant a tree for everybody who is cremated there.  I want them to play Queen 'I want to Break Free' and then have a party afterwards and noone, but noone is to wear black!
My Dad was a devout atheist(!) and said he would come back to haunt us if some 'holy joe' preached at his funeral. So basically his coffin was carried into the crematorium to the opening bars (quiet bit) of the start of the 1812 overture (his choice). My Mum, brother , sister and I did a little talk each to review his life (I even put in a couple of jokes as Dad always liked a good laugh) then he went through the curtains to banging and crashing of the 1812 finale. He didn't want a memorial or anything, but as he loved his narrowboat on the canals, he asked to 'flushed' down Napton locks on the Oxford canal. So next day we scattered his ashes in the top lock with some flowers and sent him on his way! With regard to the 'service', my cousin Feargus said if that was an atheist funeral, thats what he wanted. Everyone said how much they enjoyed it.

When I was living in Scotland and working as minister in the Church of Scotland (until 2002) we never charged for funeral services. Some others charged between �40 and �140, and some offering secular services could often be more "religious" than our services, so the local funeral directors asked me for some guidelines for secular services as many poorer people lived in our parish and they had to base there choices on financial considerations.

I drew up some guidelines and suggestions for secular services (order of proceedings, various poems and verses, various suggestions for songs, music etc if family didn't have suggestions which can often be the case - eg for child's funeral there is a brilliant passage in Winnie the Pooh) to enable family or friends to lead the service, celebrating the life of their loved one.

If they didn't feel confident to do this some of those who worked at the funeral directors were willing to step in. They were a really brilliant company. They didn't charge anything for funerals of those under 16 years of age and were extremely pastorally sensitive - apart from some practical jokes they played on me. One time a man  died who had won a local karaoke competition. He left a request that a tape of him singing should be played as his coffin entered the crematorium. His instruction was that no-one should listen to it before the funeral service.  As I was standing at the back ready to lead the coffin in, the funeral director whispered that he knew what the song was as he'd had to test the sound system beforehand. He said that I needed to prepare myself as it was "Smoke gets in your eyes" :) It took me all my time to refrain from giggling. Then the music started and I discovered the funeral director had been winding me up. It was "You'll never walk alone" If I hadn't been walking up the aisle I would have strangled the FD.

Check out the humanist society in London, they do not focus on religious rituals and aim on how you want the funeral to go.  Obviously they have a lot of experience in this area which makes the whole thing a lot easier than if you did it from scratch.
You can contact a funeral service providing company at http://www.academyfuneralservices.com.au/
All the formal work you can get from the site http://www.academyfuneralservices.com.au/about-us/

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