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Jeffju | 12:07 Mon 02nd Aug 2010 | Family & Relationships
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I am not very happy with the Care Home my mother is in at the moment. The Laundry service is awful with Mum getting back other people's underwear or old stuff e.g. tights with ladders etc. plus not washing her hair enough and as she has dementia she has now lost control of her bladder and I had to change her clothes myself the last time I visited her as she was soaked. Are we to expect this sort of thing? What can I do? It has made me so down. Just because she is unaware of her appearance now, surely she should be treated as she would have been when fully aware. Just wondered if anyone else has had any experiences similar. I may have put this under the wrong section though.
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i think there is nothing to stop you talking to the staff about the standards you expect for her. If you have previously been happy, it might be that they were temporarily short staffed on this occasion, or that she had just wet herself five minutes before you arrived. Ultimately, you have to decide what is best for her - does she seem happy? How long has she been there? What would be the benefits and costs of moving her?
i work in a care home
with regards to your mums wet clothes this could be an incontinence issue does she wear incontinence pads??? if she doesnt she may need them or if she does the ones she have maybe not absorbant enough? she should have a keyworker speak to them as they will know her the best and help with any issues
with regards to personal care every bath or shower should be logged into her personal care plan ask to see these.
There is no excuse for any of this. We tried two care homes before we found a good one for my mother. Your mother needs to be treated with the same respect as any other person. Don't get me started on the subject of care homes!! I have had my eyes opened.

Please look for an alternative care home. I asked Social Services for a list of the ones they thought were the best. The one I found for my Mum in the end was brilliant and no more expensive than any of the others. They are as good as the management.
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She has been there just about a year now, and yes she does wear the incontinence pads so it could have been that I caught things at a bad moment when everyone was busy or something but I think they should check more often. The Inspection Report for the end of last year is not as good as the previous year. It was only starred as 'adequate' so I'm going to look into somewhere else. Thank you for your replies.
I used to work in a care home - all 30 residents were dementia sufferers. I can assure you that as soon as we knew someone was wet, we'd change them right away. We'd toilet residents quite a few times a day, even if they said they didn't need to go. There were the odd times, say if the resident had been asleep, and their family visited - they'd get up to sit in another room and we'd see they were wet. We would change them straight away. Also, we knew which sort of pads the residents needed - depending how often they were wet etc.
The residents at our place were bathed once a week but were washed every morning, with soap, flannels and sprayed with deodorant. Hair was washed once a week too, the cook was also the hairdresser so set their hair for them. Admittedly, some needed it washed more than that but it would have looked awful as we couldn't style it for them and most of them only had it washed once a week before anyway.
Any tights with ladders were thrown away! All knickers and clothes were labelled so were always put in the right rooms.
It's definitely worth you speaking to the manager. It's obviously causing you a great deal of concern. Let us know how you get on - good luck :) x
P.S You shouldn't have to change your mum yourself, you should tell a member of staff and they should change her
Good luck Jeffju. My Mum ended up in a home with an 'excellent rating' one of only a few in the whole county. She was lucky there was a place for her. I was full of admiration for the home and have booked a place for myself ;o). Your mum deserves better and I hope you are successful in finding somewhere. If you have any suspicions about the quality of care, please inform Social Services. They refer people to these homes and they need feedback.

Look for a home that doesn't have a high turnover of staff and one that doesn't employ agency staff at all. It does make a difference.
Sorry to read of your problems . Have you discussed your concerns with the home manager? That should be a starting point.Have you seen Mother's care plan?This will tell you what is going on -- maybe.
Tell the manager that from now on you want Mother to have her hair washed say twice a week , or whateverand that you expect this to be done.Does the home have a hair dresser?
With regard to the clothes problem , here the difficulty lies with the famililies of residents who do not label or mark their relatives clothes.In a large home it is impossible for the laundry person to know which clothes belong to a certain resident if there are no markings.
My OH is in a residential home ,all his clothes every item is labelled , so at the end of the week I collect up oddments from his wardrobe and drawers and return them to the laundry room.
AS there are only 3 male residents , one man well built , the other frail and slight and my other half average , I often write their names in with my marker pen , return them and they do not seem to appear again.
Will be flummoxed in this if they get more average size males in the future.
I do know how you feel and if you are not satisfied after discussion , then look round and move Mother.
My other half is now in his second home and all is well, his previous home was not that good , started off well , then staff changes and so it goes.
All the very best. Brenda.
I religiously labelled every single items of my Mums and in the really awful care home it made no difference. The staff didn't take any notice and she even got blokes clothes put back in her wardrobe. My mum loved her clothes and was always immaculately turned out before she became frail and muddled and it broke my heart to see her dressed in some awful things. I used to visit her often and turn out all the wrong clothes and try and find her own things. We never did find two pairs of brand new trousers I had bought her. They were never even worn by her.

I am sorry, but in general, I think a great deal of care homes are sadly lacking.
You can look up the homes latest inspection report at http://www.cqc.org.uk/ if you need any help with this, I will help, I am currently a senior carer in a dementia unit.
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Thank you for your help. I have labelled most of Mum's clothes but it is difficult with underwear. My Mum would neverwear tights with ladders, I know it is a small thing but it hurts to see it when you remember the person they were, she loved nice clothes. I'm sure that the individual Carers do 'care' but it is true that if the management 'slips' the morale of staff soon slides and things get to an 'it will do' stage which I think has happened in our case. I'm planning to have a look at a few more places and it is helpful being able to read the inspection reports. The one Mum is currently in has slipped to a one star 'adequate' - so, there is our answer really...
1 star average is in reality quite a poor rating, 2 star is actually more of an average.
I think you need to talk to the Care Home manager listing all your complaints and ask that they be addressed. Is it a private care home or Council run? Some homes appear to have very poor staff training schemes, employ staff who do not understand fully what their responsibilities are, or who are poorly supervised.
I'd tell the Care Home manager that you expect to see a considerable improvement within one month, and if that does not happen, I would talk to Social Services and make a formal complaint. I'm not sure what professional body one can complain to if it's a private care home but even if you do move your mother elsewhere, I would still lodge a formal complaint with the local authorities to try and prevent these experiences happening to anybody else.
Jeffju, this might be helpful to you http://www.direct.gov...CareHomes/DG_10031520

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