Dinner for 1?

[filthiestfis]

I was supposed to be meeting a female friend for dinner tonight but she texted me this morning to cancel it saying she would send me an email later on to explain. So turns out the reason she cant see me tonight is because her boyfriend of 2 weeks got upset this morning when she told him that she was meeting me. How should I react to this?
I mean...Is he right to feel like this? Is she right to cave in, in order to please him?
I feel quite mad at her even though she doesnt know,because before we used to meet more regularly and now her boyfriend is hogging all her time!
Keep in mind that I have no interest in her as more than friends, however I dont like to be stood up!!

[Octavius]

Ah, its like this in the first few weeks isn�t it � even if it was a male mate he might have stood you up for the new girl. I wouldn�t take it personally, she is obviously interested in making a go of it for now. Just give her some time and see how she feels about a man dictating her life and friends in the long term. Chances are she�ll put her foot down and keep you as a friend, if not, then she doesn�t deserve you.

[kookie_101]

Your friend should still keep her plans with you, as the relationship is only in the early stages and it would be foolish for her to start giving up her long term friends because her bf says so. If she gives in to him now, then it will be harder for her to see her friends in the future without an arguement with the bf. However, he may be insecure and not realise that the two of you are just friends. A meeting with the pair of them would be an idea so he gets to know that you are not a threat. Of course you are going to be upset at being stood up and you could try explaining to your friend how it made you feel without being accusing or angry. Your friend will be the one stuck in the middle here, as she will want to keep both you and her new bf happy, and it will be hard on her to please everyone. Not sure if any of this helps, but could just give you a different view on things.

[Skreecheeboy]

Listen to Octavious.

[legend758duo]

chill it will all sort itself

its early days for them

[sarnieken]

Sounds like the first rushes of the new boyfriend.

as much as your friend obviously doesn't want to miss going out with her man, he has to realise that she has her own life, away from him.

Guarantee that, if it doesn't quite work out then she will want you as a friend to turn to.

As Octavius says (Cool name btw) don't worry about it for now but don't let it happen too often.

[jno]

sounds like it happened at short notice; her plan may well be (as mine would be) to back out of this date but take time to talk to him about it. Who knows what his actual reason for objecting was - maybe he was planning a surprise for her or something. Anyway, let their relationship settle down before you start throwing things at her. ('Hogging her all the time' is rather a harsh judgment for just 2 weeks!)

[shazzzz]

they are most likely in the throws of passion,its always like that in a new relationship,be happy for your friend i think you must like her maybe ,and if you dont like being stood up sit down ,shes still your friend invite them both out next time you may like him .

[weeal]

well if youre a bloke, and he's her new bloke, i can see he might wonder why she was having dinner with you, have you met each other yet? maybe he needs to meet you and realise you are not a threat

[Hannahb]

I think the weird bit is that her boyfriend "got upset". Why would he be upset? Sounds a bit high-maintenance/controlling/possessive. I'd be less bothered if she'd put me off because she'd got a better offer of a night out that she couldn't resist!

[filthiestfis]

Yes she told me that she will talk to him this weekend.

[Bohne]

Two weeks and he's already controlling her spare time!

WOW!

I would not have done it, but I suppose it's up to her to decide how much say in her life she will let a partner have!

[pinkkitty]

love makes people do such selfish things. remember that old adage that relationships can come and go but friends are for life.

I think most people have been on the receiving end of a friend ditching you for their new love, its' infuriating. If this new boyfriend of hers is this insecure after just 2 weeks, imagine what he'll be like a few months down the line when he's *really* in love with her. I think your friend should set the ground rules now before it gets too late - that you were her friend first, there's nothing vaguely sexual about your friendship, and she's allowed to be friends with whomever she pleases. At leasts, that's what I'd say to him if i were her.

[pinkkitty]

love makes people do such selfish things. remember that old adage that relationships can come and go but friends are for life.

I think most people have been on the receiving end of a friend ditching you for their new love, its' infuriating. If this new boyfriend of hers is this insecure after just 2 weeks, imagine what he'll be like a few months down the line when he's *really* in love with her. I think your friend should set the ground rules now before it gets too late - that you were her friend first, there's nothing vaguely sexual about your friendship, and she's allowed to be friends with whomever she pleases. At least, that's what I'd say to him if i were her.

[pinkkitty]

weird, my answer posted twice! oh well.

[cambus]

Don't mess about.
Take the dinner round and throw it at both of them!