Paul O'grady And Funeral Wishes In General

[barry1010]

Paul was buried next to his former lover as he wanted. I believe but don't know that it was in his Will and can't help but feel a little pang for Paul's widower.

I am of course projecting my own feelings on to Paul's widower who may be much bigger hearted than me.

My question is if you were in that position and your spouse stated in his/her Will that they wished to be buried next to their late ex would you comply? Funeral wishes in a Will are not legally binding so don't have to be adhered to but are public documents so if you did choose an alternative you might be found out.

[murraymints]

Murphy was his manager and partner for a very long time..and passed away due to a brain tumour... His new Husband would have been very aware of their bond and has complied with Paul's wishes as I would do..I rather suspect all 3 will lie together eventually.

[barry1010]

That would be nice

[rockyracoon]

This is a tough one, that's for sure. I'm not sure I would handle it very well as it's like saying that you're not as important as a previous partner.

[barry1010]

Would you be so understanding in that situation, murray?

[murraymints]

it would be right and proper I think

[MargoTester]

Of course I would, my conscience wouldn't let me do any differently. I would imagine it was all discussed beforehand.

[barry1010]

I think I'd be the same, rocky.

[rockyracoon]

Thinking about it, I doubt very much that I would stay in the relationship, so wouldn't have the problem of the funeral wishes.

[murraymints]

yes I would.. their partnership just can't be forgotten and the new man would have known and accepted the situation before marriage... there was real commitment between Paul and the husband , and that would have meant a great deal ...forever together... you can have love for more than one person in a lifetime

[ynnafymmi]

"His new husband".....Methinks i am getting to old for this modern world....sigh.

[barry1010]

Being flippant I think modern life will cause God a few problems in heaven with so many divorces, remarriages, step families, in laws, out laws...

[KUSTARD]

Also being flippant Barry it bothers me that my husband and his first wife might have got back together before I get there!!!

[ynnafymmi]

Yes,barry.She will have a few problems to sort out.

[davebro]

Ashes to ashes - who cares?

[barry1010]

You'd be playing the fool for eternity, Kustard (Gooseberry + custard = fool, geddit?)

[barry1010]

It's a burial, no ashes.

[davebro]

same diff

[barry1010]

I know a couple who married in their later years, she was widowed and constantly talks about her late husband, how wonderful he was, where they went, what they did - you can see her new husband (of ten years) gets fed up of it. Of course she spent most of her life with him so has a lot of stories and memories to share.
He is a divorcé and never mentions his ex-wife.

I would find that difficult to live with

[bhg481]

One of my "uncles" lost his first wife to cancer and then married one of the nurses who'd cared for her. When he died, many years later, she honoured his wish to be buried next to his first wife with the sad comment "I had him longer than she did".

[barry1010]

That's lovely, bhg