Can You Tell I Am Bored?
I took my car for a service last week... Waste of time though, couldn't quite fit it through the church doors.
I went out thieving with a couple of vampires the other day. They put me up on their shoulders so I could reach stuff. I got arrested and charged with shoplifting on two counts.
Does Sri Lanka have a Prime Minister and, if so, is he the PMSL?
I've recently developed a belief in Feng Shui.
The Jeremy Kyle show was on and I turned the TV to face the wall and felt a lot happier.
My parents were dog stylists before they started traveling the world preaching the word of God.
As a child, it was always difficult explaining to people that my folks were into doggie style before the missionary position.
I was reading through a fashion magazine and one of the pages said, "Winters coming up, find out what's hot this season!"
I thought, "Radiators."
I was once abducted by aliens. They made me wipe my face, blow my nose and eat my greens.
I think I was on board the mother ship.
Step one: Buy a sheep.
Step two: Name it "Relation".
Now you have a relationsheep.