Crosswords0 min ago
The Great Flood
An orthodox rabbi is studying in his living room, when there is a knock on the door. When he opens the door, it is a policeman, who informs him that the rivers are rising, a flood is expected, and evacuation is recommended.
The rabbi explains, "I am a man of God. I am sure he will protect me from danger."
The policeman shrugs his shoulders and leaves.
As the rabbi is watching the rising water getting closer and closer to his house, there is a second knock, this time a State Trooper. The trooper says, "Rabbi, we are evacuating the area as the flood is getting serious and you are in jeopardy."
Again the rabbi explains, "I am a man of God. I am sure he will protect me from danger. I am staying."
Well, the water continues to rise, until the rabbi is forced to stay on the second floor. He hears some yelling and looks up to see two firemen in a rowboat right outside his second floor window.
"Rabbi!" one of the firemen calls, "Get in the boat, the rains are not letting up! It's getting serious."
"I am a man of God. He will protect me from danger. I'll stay."
The firemen, fearing for their own safety, row on.
As the flood rises, the rabbi is forced to climb out onto his roof, just as a helicopter is flying over. The helicopter drops a rope ladder and a voice calls down, "We're coming to get you, rabbi!"
"No, no.... God will protect me. You go on."
Well, needless to say, the water continues to rise and the rabbi drowns. When he gets to Heaven, he is really upset. "I must see God," says the rabbi. "Please take me to God."
He is granted an audience with God.
"Lord," says the rabbi, "after a lifetime of devotion to you, why would you forsake me in my moment of need?"
God says, "You schmuck, I sent two cops, a rowboat full of firemen, and a helicopter...."
The rabbi explains, "I am a man of God. I am sure he will protect me from danger."
The policeman shrugs his shoulders and leaves.
As the rabbi is watching the rising water getting closer and closer to his house, there is a second knock, this time a State Trooper. The trooper says, "Rabbi, we are evacuating the area as the flood is getting serious and you are in jeopardy."
Again the rabbi explains, "I am a man of God. I am sure he will protect me from danger. I am staying."
Well, the water continues to rise, until the rabbi is forced to stay on the second floor. He hears some yelling and looks up to see two firemen in a rowboat right outside his second floor window.
"Rabbi!" one of the firemen calls, "Get in the boat, the rains are not letting up! It's getting serious."
"I am a man of God. He will protect me from danger. I'll stay."
The firemen, fearing for their own safety, row on.
As the flood rises, the rabbi is forced to climb out onto his roof, just as a helicopter is flying over. The helicopter drops a rope ladder and a voice calls down, "We're coming to get you, rabbi!"
"No, no.... God will protect me. You go on."
Well, needless to say, the water continues to rise and the rabbi drowns. When he gets to Heaven, he is really upset. "I must see God," says the rabbi. "Please take me to God."
He is granted an audience with God.
"Lord," says the rabbi, "after a lifetime of devotion to you, why would you forsake me in my moment of need?"
God says, "You schmuck, I sent two cops, a rowboat full of firemen, and a helicopter...."
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