Old ex-friend resurfaces

[fraggle08]

A good friend is getting married soon and among the guests (and at the bachelor parties) will be a person who used to be a very good friend but we stopped speaking for no real reason a few years ago.
It was the other person's choice, not mine, and I never knew why they did it.
we had been great pals at high school but grew apart in our early 20s when I moved away. However then one day, nothing. I would call and couldn't get hold of her. I left voicemails, I texted, at first I didn't think anything of it; she's just busy. Then after a couple of weeks it occured to me something was wrong. I never spoke to or saw that friend again, or found out why she cut me off. I did used to really upset me but then I stopped thinking about it until I recently.
So... i'm starting to feel anxious about it. In no way to I want to cause any atmosphere at my friend's wedding and tbh there will be so many people there we'll be able to avoid eachother safely all day I would think. Its the hen do that bothers me... I don't know if I should try to see her beforehand to have a talk and ensure the air is clear by the event? Or should I just ignore it, or should I ignore her?
In one way, I don't even want to go there - it was so long ago, i don't know if I want to dredge up whatever it was that caused it - after all, our lives are different now.
But on the other hand it does still make me feel sad when i think about it and how there are so many unanswered questions - "why?" being the main one!!
I can't understand why someone would do such a thing... I never had a problem with her, although as I said we had started drifting apart, but I did feel cross about being cut off with no explanation or even a text message.

[China Doll]

I would just talk to her if she talks to me and not be rude or have any kind of 'talk' with her. It's far too long ago for that sort of thing and I'd be happy to not see her again after all the wedding business is dealt with. Friendships sometimes just drift apart, there doesn't have to be a reason for it.

[pizza]

I think if it was me I would try and get in touch first,keep it light and just say you are looking forward to the wedding of your friend and would she like a catch up before.

[boxtops]

I wouldn't contact her beforehand, I really wouldn't - I'd just leave it until the hen do. I would just play it by ear then, she might be quite friendly - if she doesn't bring up the long silence between you, then I wouldn't either - if she's OK, then start again from scratch, just play it cool and friendly, but not best-matey again. She might have her reasons - and you have to accept that you might never know why, she just moved on. People do. Don't fret about it, it's not worth it.

[brenda]

Just go , be friendly to her if you manage to chat .Forget what has happened and just treat her in the same way as any other guest.

[fraggle08]

Thanks all, I know it sounds flippant but I honestly do feel better after reading those responses, its just so easy to build it into something big n scary. but yes, I think a business as usual approach is best, for me and my bride-to-be friend

[pizza]

It would be nice to hear how things go for you fraggle08 and it's nice to know the answers helped x