County Council Interview
Bloke goes to the local council to apply for a job in the office. The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"
He replies, "Yes, caffeine."
"Have you ever worked for the public service before?"
"Yes, I was in the army." he says, "I was in Iraq for two tours."
The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points towards employment."
Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The man says, "Yes. A mine exploded near me when I was there and I lost both of my testicles."
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to take you on right away.''
Our normal hours are from 8 a.m. until 4 p.m. but you can start tomorrow at 10 a.m. and carry on starting at 10 a.m. every day."
The bloke is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. why don't you want me here until 10 a.m. I'm not looking for any special treatment y'know?"
The interviewer says, "What you have to understand is that this is a council job. For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our ***. There's no point in you coming in for that."