Compost

[madiba]

PLEASE can someone help me? I can't seem to think of another purpose for multi-purpose compost, other than for growing plants in.

[hammerman]

It could be used as a soil improver for sandy or clay soils...but it's quite an expensive way of doing it.

[boxtops]

why do you need another purpose? The one you have is good enough!

[Old_Geezer]

It's great for filling holes in the garden.

[ludwig]

In a bowl with a splash of milk, it's a tastier alternative to bran flakes.

[ludwig]

You could try selling it on the streets as high grade skunk. Tell prospective customers that it's good Sh1t. That way they can't get you under the trades descriptions act later on.

[ludwig]

Fill your pockets full of it to help achieve that fashionable 'trousers at half mast' look.

..come on Madiba, that's three excellent uses I've thought up in half an hour. You're just not trying.

[boxtops]

Good for ballast too.

[tenrec]

LOL

[ludwig]

Mix it half and half with Ovaltine to make make your Ovaltine supply last twice as long.

[ludwig]

Put a little pile of it under your neighbour's car exhaust to confuse him.

[Charity]

A tablespoon of compost adds body to stews and soups.

[ludwig]

If you haven't got time to listen to a Phil Collins album, shove some into your ear holes as a reasonable substitute.

The list of uses is potentially endless. Of course it goes without saying that it has to be the multi-purpose kind. None of the above would work with the your standard compost.

[ludwig]

Go out in the night and put little hillocks of it all over your neighbour's lawn to make him think he's got moles.

[Frank97]

Lol, I like the mole hill idea!

[ladybirder]

Excellent Ludwig.

[ludwig]

Put a pile of multi-purpose compost on an armchair, and some slippers in front of the chair. Now ring the police and tell them your grandad's spontaneously combusted.

[Hopkirk]

I'm very worried about Ludwig

[Hopkirk]

Ludwig's song

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnzHtm1jhL4

[ludwig]

Paint some light adhesive over the bottom half of your face, and stick it in a bag of compost to achieve a trendy designer stubble look.