Sexual Abuse

jennyjoan | 23:51 Wed 07th Dec 2016 | ChatterBank

69 Answers

Do think it can be over-rated. Today I had to pick up my broken hoover from a man. I paid for it - he lifted it into the car and I knew (It was in my guts) he wanted to wrap his arms around me which he did (all outside the premises) - I just put it down to the guy just needed a hug. Said bye and that's the end of that matter.

Sista's New Neighbour

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Mamyalynne

A little forward perhaps but a friendly hug you didn't pull away from , doesn't equate to sexual abuse in my book.

jennyjoan

Question Author

ok Mamy - friendly hug I took it for - but I am sure others would have seen another way.

jennyjoan

Question Author

There has been sexual abuse twice in my life - but I told my mother when I was 8 or 10 - she kept secret from my father and siblings. But all she could do was go to HIS siblings and "threaten" - she was tiny lady.

Another time was when I was a gullible 18 year old - all happened before I knew it. But again all suppressed.

Mamyalynne

Invasion of personal space may be the more modern term for it.

Zacs-Master

'I just put it down to the guy just needed a hug'

But yet you saw fit to put a q on here titled 'sexual abuse'. Strange.

Mamyalynne

Oh yes, years ago and probably even still, families hushed real abuse up - very sad.

That's why more education and giving youngsters the courage to tell and know they'll be believed is vital.

jennyjoan

Question Author

you have got it right Mamy - but to be honest when the guys used to whistle at me (of course when I was young and beautiful and what I could hear of the whistle) it was a great compliment. But then I came from a different generation

jennyjoan

Question Author

Sorry Zacs - don't misconstrue that - it was a friendly hug - perhaps I did put it on a different title but I think I wanted it to be known that a friendly hug can be a friendly hug that others would take it to be sexual abuse. That's all.

Zacs-Master

Then a simple question mark after your comment would have sufficed.

jennyjoan

Question Author

Zacs - when I speak from the heart I am not worried about punctuation.

Mamyalynne

You make an interesting point JJ, but I don't know anyone who would refer to a hug however uninvited as 'sexual abuse' as a one off - if it were the start of the power and manipulation that is the main construct behind true abuse then that's different.

For many he wouldn't have got his arms round if unwanted, he's have been pushed away.

We do have to careful of the words we use when describing something.

Baldric

If it was Sexual Abuse surely for the safety of other Females he might come into contact with you should report him and press charges.

woofgang

I think its a dangerous comment that you have made although you may not have meant it that way. If someone wants a hug and you are fine with it that’s fine....but no one has the right to insist.