What A Crap First Day

[teacake44]

Peaing down of rain when I left home, arriving at school like a wet beaver. My ponytail looked like a rats tail, my polished shoes, well what a waste of time that was, socks soaked, knickers soaked, along with new PE bag and contents.

We were all herded off like cattle into the assembly hall, to stand there dripping and having to listen to the rubbish from the head teacher about her working holiday in a rehab centre for x ABs. None of the lights were working in the hall due to a faulty fuse box, the roof was leaking as it was still peaing down, and teachers were running around frantically placing fire buckets in specific areas,EU health and safety. Half a dozen kids were already being sick all over the floor due to first day jitters, so BQ had to deliver six bags of sand. Once most of that was sorted we were requested to sing All things Bright and Beautiful, and pretend we were enjoying ourselves.
After the grand start to the day we are then taken to our individual classrooms, that's when a bit of a scuffle broke out to get the best coat peg nearest the door for a quick escape at hometime, mine ended up on the floor and trodden on with muddy foot prints all over.

Then the inevitable, teacher hands out A4 paper to wright down what you did on your holidays, an excuse for her to leave the room for a cup of char in the staff room. I just put down spent most my time on AB talking crap. The scruffy little kid I've got to sit by asked me what AB was, I just said its a site where you can go and wind someone up if you've got nothing else to do, or just ask them what the hell you on about, or wind them up and don't reply to any of their comments, I said its real fun sometimes.
This scruffy little kids nose as been running all day and not a sign of a hanky, he ended up going home with a stiff sleeve, as for the odour coming from him I don't think he's bathed all holiday, but them tin baths take some filling.

Dinner was only 1s/6p a week last term, its gone up to 2 shillings, robbing ***, so I've come home in debt. At playtime we organised a protest at the increase but were threatened with detention and lines, did give that labour twit a call to help us out but said he's to busy causing problems with Boris, he did say keep up the good work.
Oh, I nearly forgot I've been voted as door stop ( door monitor) I must be at the door just before the bell, so everyone can shove and kick me all over the place at end of school, not got the badge yet to put on me blazer. Did get a lump of chalk round my lug hole mid morning for chit chatting, was asking that scruffy kid next to me what he'd had for breakfast as he kept breaking wind.

Dinner was a bit of a disappointment due to power off all morning, some sort of salad was knocked up just to make do, one lettuce leaf, slice tom, slice black pudding and as much watery salad cream as you wanted, half a scoop of ice cream to finish. Talking about finishing I just thought I wonder if I'm going on to much and you good folk on AB are getting pretty bored with me, OH GOODY!! HOPE SO :) Any how its been a bad day for first day, so think I'm going to throw a sickie tomorrow.

[Tilly2]

Truant!

[Bobbisox1]

Brilliant TC , Just brilliant , thank you

[sanmac]

Well, if you're going to throw a sickie tomorrow don't come on here all sniveling and moaning and searching for sympathy, empathy, sensitivity, neuropathy, and other such stuff.

[Mamyalynne]

Hecky thump, nothing worse than a wet beaver.

Take the week off.

[aelmpvw]

:-)

[Baldric]

Peeing not peaing,
Write not wright.

[Jordyboy9]

The ab spelling policeman strikes again,
Give it a rest Baldric,
BORING

[Bazile]

LMAO

How old are you , did you say ?

[Chinajan]

That certainly was crap, OP.

[Mexican18]

Wonderful Teacake. Well done!

[Baldric]

At 1956, have you ever considered your posts Jordy ?

[johnny.5]

Maybe tomorrow you should ask for extra English lessons.

Am I Right ?
I'm Not Wrong!

[teacake44]

Iz teer anyon uoo cain elp my wiv ma Enilicsh uumwoke frm cchool plaesa. fanks a lut.

[Bobbisox1]

Well , you learned nowt today haha

[10ClarionSt]

But other than that, was it ok?

[marval]

Well that made me laugh.

[sanmac]

I'll tell you what, teacake, we need more of these factually fantasy based threads. I can hardly wait until you confess that the snotty-nosed farting kid next to you on the first day at school tempted you to meet him behind the bike sheds at play-time and seduced you into partaking of a fag and snogging session. Also, if you can't afford the dinner money ask your mother to make you some sliced apple sprinkled with sugar sandwiches wrapped up in a road-map in case they move while you're dealing and coping with al this educational trauma.

[tamborine]

thats nothing! You woke me up from my dream of sleeping thru Boris' lecture and finding him next to me. Then he invited me to no.10 but on the way he stopped off at 'the cottage' for a pee & there was a fag machine. I asked him to buy me some but he nagged me about smoking so I was going to buy my own but lost my handbag. Had to return lecture hall for bag but some dirty rotten thieving MP must have nicked it and Boris went cold on me coz I was desperate for a fag
:(

[waterboatman]

Love it teacake. It's got me smiling, along with some of the replies. A good start to the day since I woke at 0300 and couldn't get off to sleep again! Ta! :o}

[1ozzy]

I hope the lunches improve.
Remember, a healthy Beaver gets the best wood.