Want to get rid of my housemate..

[Tock389]

Can you help with this one? I live in a house with four other people. The landlord lets out each room independently. Four of us get on really well, but the fifth, J, is proving a real pain.

He has lived in the house for three years, far longer than the rest of us. Although he is not offensive and is generally quiet, he is sat watching TV in the communal living room ALL the time. When he is in there, he refuses to let anyone else watch the things they want, and he has very little conversation when he is in there. It's getting to the point that we simply sit watching our own TVs in our own rooms.

He rarely ventures out and loves watching repeats of Top Gear on cable. He can easily afford to move into a flat on his own, or share with just one other.

It's not that he has done anything wrong, but we desperately want our living room back- any suggestions?

[WendyS]

Hmm, It does rather sound as if he's a bit of a loner with poor social skills and finds it difficult to make friends. I guess, because of this he also hasn't learnt much about accommodating other peoples' needs and the art of compromise I guess if you've all got TV's in your own rooms, he feels entitled to hog the one in the communal room without causing any inconvenience.

Perhaps he hasn't moved out because he's lonely and likes to have other people around. How about the rest of you getting some board games, jigsaws or quizzes which you operate from your living room and inviting him to join in?. I don't think you should allow yourselves to be driven out however, and maybe you suggest to him that he buys his own TV and watches it in his own room so that the communal room can return to its proper use as you all pay rent for it. Otherwise, perhaps you all should start up your own House Choir and start holding rehearsals in the Living Room ! He sounds like a bit of a depressive and needs to be encouraged to get out and join a gym, go swimming or take up some interesting new evening classes.

[sammd]

You could try getting everyone in the house to sit down and talk to him about the issue or just try to get in the lounge before him! If all else fails ask your landlord to ask him to leave, although hogging the tv may not be enough grounds to kick him out.

[DMA]

Have you tried burying him uder the patio? joke AB so please dont ban it!

[Jennykins]

There can be so many isues going on here with that roommate of yours... like... lonley, control freak.. or maybe just is weird.. in any case.. talk to him and tell him how you feel, Not in a way that he may feel your "attacking" him though..as in do not use words like YOU do this, and YOU make me feel... why not.. things like "I" feel like "I" have done something wrong?? "I" need to know what "I" have done to make this tension in the air when "I" come in the living room to watch tv??? That way your not "jumping" on him and he cant react bad to you.. if he does not open up and you get no progress.. then well, your stuck with a dude with an attitude... Roommates can be a lot of drama ... so sometimes you just have to take a deep breath and look forward to living on your own.. Good luck!!!!

[irisred]

Maybe you four should move out and leave him to it. If you all get on it seems like the logical answer!

[joko]

why don't one of you lend him one of your own tvs to have in his room? he would probably prefer it anyway.

you could always get an extra cable box or even freeview so he can watch whatever he wants.

if he refuses this, have a house meeting and say you are working out a rota so that everyone gets one night a week or something where they get to choose what is watched and none of you will take no for an answer

[mr_pointment]

bet hes the only male.kick in the nuts is what he needs,shauvanistic get lol

[mr_pointment]

post his email addy

[Bohne]

It sounds like it was HIS living room first.
I guess you have tried talking to him, already.
If he's not willing to compromise, just try to ignore him.
Play board games while he is watching TV.