ChatterBank3 mins ago
mum's stressing me out about my future
4 Answers
im at a point in my life which is very pleasant. im 17 and all of a sudden the world wants me to plan the rest of my life out now.
all through school, my mum's always said to me i dont care what you do as long as you are happy.
but since doing Alevels and changing my mind on my future career, she's been a bit more of a "pushy parent".
at 6th form im doing pshychology, biology, chemistry and forensic science.
i had to pick these a year ago when i wanted 2 b a forensic scientist. now, all i want to do is be in the police force.
out of the subjects, its chemistry that is really upseting me and really starting to get me down. (aswell as having 2 jobs, one of which i've had to have some time off from to cope with the amount of work i have)
i spoke to my teacher about dropping the subject and he didnt take me seriously at all, and mum was behind me on the decision that i made. i ended up not dropping chemistry, but doing it for the rest of the year. after i told her about this she said that she didnt want me 2 drop it in the first place, and know sh'es having a go at me 4 dropping one of my jobs. i really cant win!
can someone help?!
sara xx
all through school, my mum's always said to me i dont care what you do as long as you are happy.
but since doing Alevels and changing my mind on my future career, she's been a bit more of a "pushy parent".
at 6th form im doing pshychology, biology, chemistry and forensic science.
i had to pick these a year ago when i wanted 2 b a forensic scientist. now, all i want to do is be in the police force.
out of the subjects, its chemistry that is really upseting me and really starting to get me down. (aswell as having 2 jobs, one of which i've had to have some time off from to cope with the amount of work i have)
i spoke to my teacher about dropping the subject and he didnt take me seriously at all, and mum was behind me on the decision that i made. i ended up not dropping chemistry, but doing it for the rest of the year. after i told her about this she said that she didnt want me 2 drop it in the first place, and know sh'es having a go at me 4 dropping one of my jobs. i really cant win!
can someone help?!
sara xx
Answers
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My 'kids' are 20 and 21 and still don't really know what they want to be. Both experienced similar things to you at A level ie one option wasn't working - in their cases the college was very keen for them not to drop, and they caved in to that pressure so continued with something that made them miserable and added a coupla points to their UCAS applications.
Both are now happily doing degrees - they didn't know they would choose this but when the time came, it was right for them. I have tried to butt out of all their choices, the only ground rule being they need to be able to support themselves eventually. I had a mortal fear of ending up as a pushy parent even tho I have had all the advantages of school and uni myself.
Your mum might be scared that you'll lose out on one-time opportunities. The thing is though that society has changed so quickly that the old idea of 'a career for life' is not going to be the case for most people.
Have confidence - believe in yourself - be prepared to support yourself - and try not to be swept up in other people's aspirations for you, which are probably well meant but may not serve you the best.
Both are now happily doing degrees - they didn't know they would choose this but when the time came, it was right for them. I have tried to butt out of all their choices, the only ground rule being they need to be able to support themselves eventually. I had a mortal fear of ending up as a pushy parent even tho I have had all the advantages of school and uni myself.
Your mum might be scared that you'll lose out on one-time opportunities. The thing is though that society has changed so quickly that the old idea of 'a career for life' is not going to be the case for most people.
Have confidence - believe in yourself - be prepared to support yourself - and try not to be swept up in other people's aspirations for you, which are probably well meant but may not serve you the best.
Your Mum probably just wants you to get as many qualifications as you possibly can, in order for you to maximize your future options!
It's a tough world out there when the average house price is going to be many times your salary and I'm quite sure your Mum just wants absolutely the best for her child.
However, she sounds like she is not being particularly helpful in her pursuit of this matter, so perhaps you should bring up the subjct with her and discuss the options between you.
It would seem, by your A level choices that you are very clever, so to maximize this would be your best option. Joining the Police, although certainly not an easy option, is not going to use your 'scientific' brain to its full potential.
It is hard at 17 to envisage the rest of your life and your Mum is furthur along the 'life curve' than you, which gives her more of an insight into life itself.
It's a tough world out there when the average house price is going to be many times your salary and I'm quite sure your Mum just wants absolutely the best for her child.
However, she sounds like she is not being particularly helpful in her pursuit of this matter, so perhaps you should bring up the subjct with her and discuss the options between you.
It would seem, by your A level choices that you are very clever, so to maximize this would be your best option. Joining the Police, although certainly not an easy option, is not going to use your 'scientific' brain to its full potential.
It is hard at 17 to envisage the rest of your life and your Mum is furthur along the 'life curve' than you, which gives her more of an insight into life itself.
I went to sixth form for about 2 months a couple of years ago, and I hated it. I left even though my mum was really devastated about it, although my dad backed me all the way.
I went straight into an awful full time job, which was okay at first but now I hate it.
But it made me apprieciate what both sides are like...
(I'm going back to education in october, and I so excited!)
The moral of this story is that, you have all the time in the world, and it's your life and it's up to you what you do with it.
There's no point following what someone else wants you to do because you'll be the one maybe dissappointed in the end.
I went straight into an awful full time job, which was okay at first but now I hate it.
But it made me apprieciate what both sides are like...
(I'm going back to education in october, and I so excited!)
The moral of this story is that, you have all the time in the world, and it's your life and it's up to you what you do with it.
There's no point following what someone else wants you to do because you'll be the one maybe dissappointed in the end.
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