I feel like im mentally sinking into a hole

[100gym]

My relationship is on the rocks because of the arguments because ive become impossible to live with. my physique has gone to pot and i can't find no work, im drinking half a bottle and maybe six beers every two days the only thing stopping me drinking everyday is the hangover and money. Four years ago i had it all i was on top of my game, not the best job in the world but i was happy and my relationship was new and i never had a care in the world. i walked out of that job to pursue a college course which never worked out and now im feeling the repercussions of walking out of a secure good paying job and the failure of not being able to complete my college course, now im seriously in debt and am not sure how long i can carry on, everyday is the same and like walking on a never ending escalator with me going nowhere. Christmas is looming and i can honestly say im dreading it, i really don't want to be here any more (Alive on this miserable planet) but i have children and because of this i could never do anything stupid, or at least when im sober. I keep telling myself that for every up there's a down and trying to remain positive but im believing myself less and less each day that goes past, i wish i could just get rid of my debt and disappear to sort my head out because im really hating myself and my life at the moment, there has to be a way out, is this all that im destined for? Am i the only person on this planet going through something like this?

[boxtops]

I am sure you are not, gym,many of us are feeling pressures of debt and other problems but you seem to have more than your fair share at the moment. You won't get rid of your debt and keep your kids' respect by being boozed up, though - can you think of a distraction? You could go to a public gym a couple of times a week for what you are spending on drink. Please don't think I'm being superior, we are skint ourselves but at least we have work to distract us. Have you been to see your GP? They might refer to you to someone you can talk to about your situation, to try to find a foothold to get your way out of the pit. Recognising your problems is a big step though, I wish you good luck with it.

[jaydah]

Start with the CAB, to help you work out a reasonable repayment plan. Then search for any work that pays; no matter what.

[ladyalex]

Boxtops has given you good advice.
The best thing you can do at the moment is to knock the drink on the head. It is making you worse (alcohol is a depressant) and is contributing to your debt.
Citizen's Advice can point you to a Debt Counselling Service which should help you to get control of your debts.
Are you sure about the College course ? Have you discussed option with the College? If they can help you in any way, they will.
Any chance of you going back to your old job ? If you can swallow your pride and ask for it back, it would help with the money side of things.
You're by no means alone and, as Boxtops said, maybe a trip to your GP would be helpful.
All the best.

[NOX]

Speaking as an ex drug and alcohol abuser I have tell you something vitally improtant that you're losing sight of - nothing is worth dying for mate. First off you tried something that for whatever reason didn't work out for you, that in itself is not a failing, you now know that is not for you. By your own admission you said your previous job, although well paid, didn't light your fire- this is your opportunity to do whatever it is that you really want to with life even though it may not seem easy. Thirdly- you seem to be getting awfully bogged down with the fact that you're in debt- there is usually a way out of that whether it be coming to arrangements with your creditors, an IVA- there are lots of options and you have choices. Your first step to becoming who and what you want to be again is to stop drinking- I've done it and it's not always as arduous as you might think. Make decisions to deal with problems and take back control because at the moment you appear to be freewheeling- your energy will start to return once you're more on top of things because you sould very, very depressed which is probably 90% of your problem. So no your not the only person who is or has felt like this, I did once and now I don't, you can do it and you will do it, just chip away at things a little at a time.

[anneasquith]

well done nox, i admire your honesty, and hope gym takes your advice. good luck.

[rowanwitch]

Been there too ...best advice I was given.....1) see your GP and not just for pills I was referred for extended counselling which helped me work out what i really wanted 2) Contact national Debtline either online, by phone or in person at one of their offices..within a couple of weeks .I was able to reschedule all my debts and start getting some control yes it has long term effects on credit score but you need to get control now.....
3) try to improve your diet and increase your exercise even if it iss going for a short walk a couple of ties a day and while you are walking keep your head up and really look around...daft as it sounds seeing the trees and flowers was a bigger help than I expected
4) Christmas is one day....if the children are old enough explain about money being tight and keep presents to a minimum don't do what a friend did and get into even more debt giving them everything they asked for...in the longer term they will get more benefit from having you back to normal.....

Let us know how you get on....

[Whoever]

You're not the only person on the planet who is drinking too much, in debt, and doesn't know where to turn.
As you're obviously competent with a computer, sign on to www.moneysavingexpert.com, give yourself a user name and join their forums. There's a Debt section of the forum and you can get lots of helpful advice there on how to go forward, as well as support from others in the same situation.

Please do this for the sake of your children. And check out for the nearest Alcoholic Anonymous group, where you will also get some support. Having watched a relative destroy family, marriage, health, employment because of drinking, you need some help now. You obvious have money in your pocket to spend on alcohol. Give your money to somebody else to look after if you don't trust yourself. If you value your relationship it's important to realise that even bad situations can be turned around with support and determination, so make this the day when you start making a few decisions to turn your life around. Once you've got some positive actions under way you will probably start to feel more positive and in control of your situation.