Written English

[Bigeye74]

Just finished a technical degree, however was heavily (and fairly) criticized for my relaxed writing style. This is something I need to improve upon. I have made an effort to use a thesaurus, however changing the words doesn't change the music. Any suggestions?
Thx

[Scylax]

This is a common fault which unfortunately can
prove disastrous in Academia.

At this late stage the best advice I could give is
to urge you to take a long hard look at dissertations
that have been submitted for higher degrees, e.g.
MA, MSc, MEd. etc., or theses submitted for
Doctorates.

Lots of these will be available for perusal in the
libraries of Universities where you live, or study.
Don't be afraid to copy the styles of writing ; it is
not plagiarism, it is life-saving.