Did Any Of You Mother Out There Feel Guilty When Bringing Up Your Children Due To Bad Choices You Made Or Having Been Dealt A Bad Hand In The Card Game Of Life?

[1Happymum]

I never finished school and never had family around me or any real friends and had a beautiful baby girl 6 months ago with a what i now know to be a lazy and immature deadbeat dad whose family don't really care whether he sees the baby or not so i looks like i'm on my own and so far it's been a real struggle with me living in a horrible area in a ramshackle home and the future doesn't look too bright but i know i'll fight to give my little girl the best start i can and hope to find a way to study and get out of this mess.

I can't help feeling guilty that she'll never have no real family, dad or the best toys and clothes due to my situation of being unemployed and uneducated.

Have any of you been through the same thing? Did it turn out alright in the end?

[murraymints]

Things don't matter hunni....love from your mum does !! You'll get there ! Xx

[ummmm]

Look at it this way, can you remember being 6 months? Being 1? 2? 3?

[Sharingan]

You are not 'uneducated'. You have written this and clearly think deeply. Even if you can't go to college or university just yet, don't let that stop you from learning, if you can read the world is your oyster, you can do nearly anything. Are you in the UK or the USA?

[Canary42]

With a positive and determined attitude like yours, FORGET THE GUILT, it's invalid and pointless.

My Mum was widowed in the second world war and left to bring up me and my twin brother on her own (with some help from her widow mother) in straitened circumstances, and with an attitude like yours she won through in the end (and is still going strong at 98). Go for it, and good luck.

[andy-hughes]

My youngest daughter left her husband after ten months of marriage - they have a boy who is now three.

It now turns out he was violent and controling, and they are battling about custody through solicitors.

My daughter was convinced that her future was bleak - she had to move back in with us, and she works as a nursery nurse on minimum wage.

Right months ago, she met a wonderful guy who has given her back her confidence and loves both her and her son. They have a rented house together, and she is attending an access course prior to attending university to obtain a degree in midwifery.

Through it all, her son's love sustained her, and she vowed always to do the best for him, no matter what.

It's clear that her little one is happy as long as he is with his mum, and the rest of her life is now on a positive path.

You will get past this time - and as long as your daughter has her mum to love and support her, the rest will follow.

Look at the good things, you are a strong woman and no doubt a wonderful mum, and that is the best start any child could want.

[Sparkles62]

Happymum, your name says it all. Be happy and enjoy your beautiful little girl.
The best things you can give your daughter are love, and teach her right from wrong, and be there for her when she needs you,
then hopefully she will grow up to be a careing thoughtful person like you, and not like her father.
Material things are not important, any parent will tell you, you can spend a fortune on toys when they are young and they will still have more fun playing with the box!
When mine were little we didn't have very much money, and as they were old enough to understand i gave them choices, such as, they could have the latest trainers or the 'right amount of stripes ' on their pants OR we could all go on holiday ( usually camping ) but I couldn't afford to do both.
They always went for the holiday.
they may not have always had the latest toys, or everything that they asked for but they have all grown up into lovely adults and parents..........but then, i am their Mum, and I'm biased. lol. X

[bednobs]

just to let you know, i don't struggle, or have a bad start but i DO feel guilty about things to do with being a parent. I thik it'suniversal

[fairycakes69]

Life is what you make if it. Our daughter will have your love that's all she needs, no point in having a dad around who doesn't care. You never know what's round the corner. My eldest daughter had her first child at 17, boyfriend finished with her 12 weeks into the pregnancy via text. Not seen or heard from since. She rushed into another relationship as she didn't want to be on her own. He was not a nice person, 3 years after, he left her 3 weeks before the baby was due. She managed to pull herself together, realised she didn't need a man and got on with being a great mum. She went to college and worked at nights. 2 years on she met a lovely lad, took it slowly as the girls came first, took her a long time to trust men again. They have now been together 4 years and had twins a few months ago. She has started up her own cake business, I have never seen her so happy. She thought her life was over at 17. You just never know what's ahead, stay positive and all will be fine. Goodluck to you.