Alcoholic And Sickness Benefit

[kloofnek]

My daughter is an alcoholic!!!
She was on the dole for a while when her other job ended and got herself a lovely flexible little job...just right with having a 12 year daughter.Now it looks like she will lose it as she is having odd days off(|hungover),so will surely lose it.
She will not get dole(Jobseekers Allowance) and someone has told me she will have to go on sick benefit but her doctor doesn`t know she drinks so how will he believe her and also I don`t call that an "illness".

I seem to remember it takes a long time to get it...what will she live on? I am worried sick about it all and it`s not as if she is a teenager...she`s 39 years old for God`s sake!!!

[ummmm]

She'll need to see her GP and admit that she has an alcohol problem.

He will probably send her for tests to see if she's done any damage to her body. He will also be able to advise her on what help is available and any support groups.

[Octavius]

Difficult to judge really, but my sister was an alcoholic (officially) for over 20 years becase of a traiuma in her teens and she would not have 'odd' days off, she would turn up to work off her tree, then top up with more alcohol, then not turn up for days on end, with the inevitable result.

She has been in sectioned, put into rehab, has had her children removed and we finally convinced her after a very bad period of illness to go to the doctor who did tests and said she will die within two years if she doesnt rehabilitate.

So if you are genuinely serious, please do no make light of it, and yes it can be termed a chronic illnes borne of mental personality disorder.

[kloofnek]

Believe me,I am not taking it lightly but she has no reason to need to drink.close family around her etc.Can drink be an inherited "illness"?

[Octavius]

The traits can be genetic.

[ummmm]

They say that being prone addiction can be inherited.

[bednobs]

are you a drinker too then?
anyway, having the odd day off with a hangover doesn't make her unable to work, so i don't see she could get sickness benefit. If she loses her job, she'll just have to get another. I think JSA is only sanctioned for a period of time, not forever

[AB Editor]

"she has no reason to need to drink"

She might have issue you're not aware of. She might be putting on a brave face for you. Have you spoken to her about this in a serious way yet?

[sandyRoe]

Her GP might give her a prescription for medication to help her deal with the withdrawl symptoms and a referral to an addiction treatment centre. It could take a long while before they see her.
I don't know how the benefits system works now but I can't see how the parent of a child could be left with no means of support.

[RATTER15]

kloofnek, //I am not taking it lightly but she has no reason to need to drink.//

I think that statement shows that you really do not understand alcoholism. she needs to drink because she is an alcoholic. that is often the only reason alcoholics drink. it isn't always about about a traumatic life or incident etc.

[ummmm]

My accountant is an alcoholic. He doesn't get withdrawal symptoms when he comes off it. He says that he's mentally addicted, addicted to the numbing effect alcohol gives him.

He's deeply unhappy. You don't have to have had a trauma in your life to be unhappy.

[kloofnek]

I agree ummmm,she had a bad relationship with a guy,who also drank,yet sober,he is a lovely man.However,that is over.I thought things would look up after that but obviously it has not.
Oh dear,not much I can do ,if she won`t help herself.

[ummmm]

How is her daughter?

[kloofnek]

When she is sober,you would never think she has a problem.
But when she is drunk,she is terrible,can get a bit aggressive,depends what said to her...then she is saying sorry all the time and asking me to help her.
She lives about 10 mins walk from me and don`t see her all the time,usually comes for some lunch once a week after work(works mornings) and we have all the family Sunday dinner about once a month.

[kloofnek]

By the way,never aggressive with,I must point out.

[ummmm]

What is she like as a parent?

[Peter Pedant]

you arent getting much benefits advice on this thread Kloofje
I think you should go to Citizens advice
and remember there is 12 y o in the picture
which from the dole point of view may make things easier (for her)

[anneasquith]

if your daughter is alcohol dependent she really must see her gp asap. good luck.

[FredPuli43]

Forget any idea that alcoholics drink for a reason. The family look for a reason (bereavement, stress at work, divorce etc) and the alcoholic seizes upon any reason, but it's rubbish. Normal people may take a drink to calm their nerves, or after a tough day and so on, but they aren't alcoholics. Your daughter is addicted, but will be grateful for any excuse to make herself feel justified in drinking.

It does take a long time to 'get it'. The alcoholic is in denial and the worse the condition gets, the stronger the denial's grip. And she has no hope of getting better until she accepts that she is dependent, that she lives to drink. That she can work some days and then feel too bad to do so, doesn't prove much. She is probably drinking every day and can function with an amount of alcohol inside her; indeed, stone cold sober she might not be able to function at all; but now and again she has just a bit too much, and can't.

She has to go to her doctor and a test for liver function, a blood test. And it would help a lot if she goes to an open meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous (one that is for the curious, rather than a closed one for people who have long accepted that they are alcoholics and who are in recovery)

[friedgreentomato]

//if your daughter is alcohol dependent she really must see her gp asap. good luck.//

That would mean that the daughter would have to admit that she has a problem which they don't tend to do!

[kloofnek]

She lovers her daughter ,never violent towards herand is terrified of losing her..she wouldn`t cos if push came to shove,my other daughter will have her which she does when things get bad,in fact,she has had her the last two nights...and as she only lives four doors away from me,I am on hand to help as well.
Peter,I thought the same...however,I have had reason in the past to consult CAB and they turned out to be hopeless ,after having bveen to them I went elsewhere and got the CORRECT inf.But this could just be my CAB who are not on the ball.