Help In English Please

[fatema]

Hello! As you all know that I got admission to a German university and my winters semester will be online, so last week I got an email from the university that I have to attend a free German language course, which is offering by the university and you have to register yourself before 19th of August. So I'm going to write to them and email where I want to show my interest to learn the German language. Can someone proofread my email, please? Thank you in advance.
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Dear Sir/Madam,
My name is ABC and recently I got admission at XYZ university, my course is ----. my winter semester will be online and I will attend my summer semester physically at university. I'm willing to take admission in a german language which is offering by XYZ university. I have filled my registration form and it is attached with the email along with my admission letter, please let me know if any further information is required.
thank you and regards,
abc.

[Ringlet]

All? I for one didn't know you had got admission to a German university.

[Ringlet]

My name is ABC and recently I was granted admission to XYZ university. My course is - - - - -. My winter semester will be online, and I will attend my summer semester physically at university. I am willing to attend the German language course which is offered by XYZ university. I have filled in my registration form, and it is attached with this email, together with my admission letter. Please let me know if any further information is required. Thank you. Regards, ac.

[allenlondon]

Couple of observations, Fatema.

‘Got’ is inelegant; ‘gained’ sounds better. (And ‘granted’ sounds a bit too subservient).

As Ringlet has corrected, the comma after ‘admission letter’ should be a full stop. (J K Rowling is often guilty of this basic error and it hasn’t held her back!)

[DTCwordfan]

Very few folk can speak and write English on here - just look at the number of threads on grammar and punctuation.

Why not write it in German or send in both a German and English letter?