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teenagers
my 15 year old is not badly behaved but he seems to have no interest in doing anything. he goes to school but has few friends. he has gone down from 9 gcse's to 4 because he would not be able to pass 9 as he has not done the work necessary. even going down to 4 he is still not doing enough work. the school knows all this but it is as though they only help the kids who are willing to work. they just ring up to say he is wearing the wrong uniform but i can't get him dressed in the mornings and he will only wear his weekend jeans as he hates school trousers and shirt. when they ring i say can you do your job and educate him? i try but he is more of a doer, he loves cooking, gardening, compiling a website, biking, drawing and he hates reading and writing. any suggestions on how to get him to buckle down for his exams? or any ideas on what he could do when he leaves school in june.
thanks
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I'm not particularly academic myself and when I went to school I genuinely struggled to get my results.
However, (and i'm sorry if this causes offence) with only 4 poor gcses he's not going to get very far in the world.
You say he's not a bad lad and this may well be true but he definately sounds like he has an attitude problem (in common with a lot of teenagers today).
I've seen this before with my nephew. He's more hands on too, but only when it pleases him.
He tried an apprenticeship but quit after a week or so because he thought the bosses were slave drivers. Your son can't even manage to wear a school uniform like every other pupil so what chance is there that he will buckle down and do a job when he's told to.
Well personally I think not wearing his
school uniform is a great thing because it shows individuality, the refusal to buckle down to pointless rules and that he has enough self confidence to refuse to do soemthing he feels is unnecessary or wrong.The
non uniform wearers are always the hands on or creatives ( my eldest son is an artist/photographer... he was a non uniform wearer).
What you might find is that he is a square peg in a round hole at school but that if he leaves he can then do his gcse's at college in a year without any difficulty so in the big scheme of things it's possibly not as life threatening as you think.College is far more laid back and used to schools not always doing their best for the kids there so he won't be the only one topping up his gcse's.
He may decide to work for himself, but why not ask him what he wants to do. If he has no idea then suggest gently that he might want to top up on gcse's and A levels at college. He sounds a nice lad, which is the most important thing.
noxlumos,
A uniform is not pointless as you say. One of the main reasons why schools have uniforms is so that everybody can be treated equally, so that you don't get into situations where children are bullied for wearing the wrong types of clothes. I know this happens, we had a uniform at our school but you could still wear you own shoes and that used to be a subject of ridicule if you wore the wrong ones.
Its good to be individual but people must still have respect for rules and laws.
noxlumos.
I can understand where you are coming from but a second hand uniform is still going to look like a uniform whereas a child wearing charity shop / cheap shop clothes is going to stand a mile out when everybody else is wearing designer gear.
I'm glad your children have done well and obviously you have taught them well.
Most schools make it a rule that uniform is worn, and when you get down to fundamentals laws are in essence rules. If everybody decided to do their own thing, society would soon break down.
Now he feels stressed and trapped - his words - I think if a boy is non-academic it is quite hard because if they're not particularly naughty and thereby dont draw attention to themselves, they can kind of coast along at school not doing very much and it doesnt really get picked up on til its almost too late.
You can buy school uniform for a lot less than �400, though I concede that a special blazer or jumper may be required which may cost a little more.
It seems you have some really bad experiences with schools if you think that all teachers get some perverse kick out of forcing children to wear uniform. And as for liking school rules to Hitler!
I'm not a teacher far from it, but I have friends and family who are in the teaching profession.
Whilst not really comparable I had dyslexia and speach problems as a child, and the experience that i had was that the teachers tried their damnest to help me.
I suppose it all boils down to individual circumstances, I had to wear a uniform and i remember the bullying that used to go on over the shoes, and the fact that when ever we had a dress down day, it wasn't a totally enjoyable experience as you had to make sure what you wore didn't single you out for ridicule.
I am sorry if I have come over rude or insensitive its just that I feel that teachers get enough flack nowadays as it is.