Advice needed please

[Whickerman]

Have also posted this in the Jobs section, but I'd like as much input as possible and you guys could potentially look at this from another point of view.
Believe me, before I ask this I know it's a good position to be in, and I recognise how bloody lucky this is.

I have a decent job. It's senior management level in a medium sized multinational, very autonomous, get a fair bit of travel and the job is very flexible. My boss gets annoyed if I work too many hours, so it's very family friendly. They support my further education, pay expenses quickly and without fuss, pay my family's private healthcare and it's not very onerous. The salary is the downside - it's enough to live on, but I'll never be rich.

I've been offered a job in a large pharmaceutical company, and this would pay about half again what i'm currently getting. The job spec shows an obvious increase in the amount of hours I'd have to work though, and I'd be entering a serious high-flying corporate company.

So - what's more desirable? Great family life with a small amount of stress, or a plunge into the unknown with great money?

[Oneeyedvic]

Great family life with a small amount of stress - unless there is a good get out plan with the other job (eg 5 years, pay off the mortgage and go back to enjoying family time).

[Oneeyedvic]

Just a thought - did you apply for another job or were you head hunted?

If it was the former, I guess you must be unhappy to have thought about leaving.

[naomi24]

Hi Whicker, that's a difficult one - on the surface - but personally I think family life and less stress is paramount. OK, you could earn more, but you have to consider what the real cost of that may be. Companies these days often expect - and demand - far more than their pound of flesh, and it could result in you having very little time for your home life. Tempting as it may be, money isn't everything. Quality of life and peace of mind are far more important. If you're weren't happy where you are, then I'd say give it a go, but since you are happy then think very seriously before you leap. It's a jungle out there. :o)

[Whickerman]

Thanks guys

Oneeyedvic - it was them who came to me.

Naomi - I think I'm ready to agree with you and oneeyedvic. I am happy, although not to have to worry about bills would obviously be fabulous (I'm doing ok in that sense but have a daughter heading to uni soon).
But as you both say, happiness could be lost in other ways. I suppose the money is just sooo tempting.

[Octavius]

In your post you said �its enough to live on, but I�ll never be rich�.

If you want to be rich then people like you and me have to work for it, and work hard at it. The periphery details like family and no stress go out of the window, for a few years until you have �made it� at least. But by then, what have you sacrificed and missed out on? Plus there is no guarantee that it will all stop. The higher you go the more stress and less inter-company friends you�ll have, and of course, the higher you�ll fall. It�s a risk. But are you willing to take it?

It�s a decision only you can make as it will also depend on the work involved (interesting, challenging, promotion prospects etc) the corporate culture (work makes you rich) and whether you like the idea - for a time � of being a small cog in a very big wheel. As said above, what is the motivation for the move, to get rich or to leave an unfulfilling job?

If you are up for pulling out all the stops to get rich, then why not take the plunge.

From personal experience, I would have done it a younger age, and I did. In recent times I have given up the dollars and focussed on less stress and a happy family life, but that is because I am able to live comfortably and enjoy work. I found the more you earned the more you needed, enough is never enough, and I was earning big bucks in London. The only stress I have now is that which I put upon myself, but its only enough to keep the edge, go the extra mile and stay ahead of the competition.

Ten years ago I would say chase the wad, but now I would sit firm with a happy balance.

Good luck with the decision, I don�t envy you.

[Clanad]

I may have a different approach to your quandry, Whickerman. Firstly, as Octavius alludes, your chronological age does come into play. But, if you can make the transition without a lot of stress on your family (and self) then you'll avoid one of the real pitfalls of staying in place... that being, in 5 or 10 years or more (or less) I can guarantee you'll wake up one night or a series of nights and wonder what things would have been like if you'd only had the Cojones to give it a try. Face it, at some time in the near future, your children will be grown and on their own... and you'll have even more time to mull over the road not travelled.
You sound like a talented person. You can stay put and think your placing your family first, but find out later that didn't mean a whole lot, especially when the kids leave.
I have some grown kids and not once have they ever said "you should have taken the job we thought you should take"... So, as I'm sure you have, talk it over with the wife and consider the ramifications of the 3:00AM talk with yourself you are sure to have... sometime...

Best of luck!

[Velvetee]

Is the company you work for newly established or only been trading for a short time? Will there be chances of promotion and more money in the future? Are you a highly ambitious person who wants to climb the career ladder?

To me, it sounds like you have a great job. I agree the financial rewards are important, especially if you have a family, but then you have to consider if you take this other job, you may be earning lots more, but will you actually get to spend time with your family or will they want to spend time with you, as mostly likely you will be stressed and like a bear with a sore head.

As someone who doesn't get on well with lots of stress, I prefer to have a little less money and feel happy and relaxed within myself. I don't want to feel the pressures of maintaining targets, answering to people, who themselves have high stress levels, so are probably not very nice to work with.

Only you can decide what you want. Perhaps you can earn more money on the side doing something else, like becoming an E bayer!

[keyplus90]

I personally believe that if you have enough to meet two ends then family life is important than any thing else. However if you are struggling for even basics of life then that will have a toll on your family life sooner or later. As recently life is becoming so formula one pace that the yesterday's luxuries are today's necessities.

But I would never bargain my family life with any thing.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/a rticle.html?in_article_id=488241&in_page_id=18 79

[Octavius]

It�s a good post keyplus, but it is far easier to make the decision to �step down� than it is to �step up�. Dropping the �250k a year job is quite an easy decision as he would have no doubt built up quite a nice little nest egg to wander off and do what he likes with it. Similarly my decision was made easy as I mentioned above. For some people it would seem crazy to give up the money, but to others, there is the self-satisfaction of knowing you have �been there and done it�.

When it�s the other way round you really have to weigh up all the pros and cons, especially if you are �of an age� and you have security/family to consider first. Life is full of what ifs, but if you take the decision for the right reasons, then you should be able to look back on life without regrets.

[keyplus90]

Octavius - Can't agree with you more brother. 100% on spot. It is the one who is going through the situation, is the right person to see how he sees it.

[Whickerman]

Hi All

Well, I've spoken with the family and done a lot of soul searching. We're doing ok finacially, and I've been reminded of a time some years ago where we weren't so fortunate and I worked averages of 65 hours a week just to make ends meet. SO - the decision (my decision) is that for the moment I'll be staying put. The company is quite established, but there's only one rung left on the ladder. I'll aim for that and see what happens.

Thanks to all for your input, it's a real help to bounce this off people who aren't directly involved.

[Whickerman]

Just one more thing. I'm in my 30s still, so I reckon I've a small few years left before age will become an issue. If i haven't succeeded in my new plan in 3-4 years, then i'll get back on the market.

Your help is appreciated everyone, thanks.

[naomi24]

Good luck, Whicker.

[123everton]

If you've got job security then stay were you are.

[BillyBB]

Another idea is to tell your boss about the headhunting. Loyalty may be rewarded if they are scared of loosing you.