Further re Potential Nursing Home Fees

[Mirandajane]

My mother is nearly 88 and I am 63 and caring for her.
Mum has physical problems but there are no signs of dementia or any need to go into a nursing home at present as long as I care for her.
Owing to her physical problems we have decided a walk in shower is necessary.
She also needs a new bed and a ramp for her wheel chair. I have been pulling it up the step but I am no longer a spring chicken and I fear I could damage myself if I continue with this.
My car is nearly 9 years old and has done 98,000 miles and is a Fiesta.
Again I can get her wheel chair into it but it is a real effort at my age as I often have to take it out to reposition it to get luggage in etc. I am intending to get a new car and if I was not taking Mum into account there are suitable new cars costing about £9,000.
To get something new to easily take the wheel chair the car would cost £14,000 to £15,000.
Mum also wants me to take her on 2 holidays in 2012 both 4 day breaks and she has seen 7 holidays in 2013 all 3 and 4 day breaks which she wants to go on.
As anybody can tell a few thousand £'s are going to have to be spent to make it reasonable for me to keep her at home but the holidays may be a mute point.
I am intending to use some of Mum's money towards the car ( about £5,000, the house improvements and for her share of the holiday expenditure.
If things suddenly go wrong and Mum has to go into care would I be liable for all these expenses?.
I am a pensioner myself and I had a neighbour who appeared to be OK and she suddenly had to go into care 4 months later.
I know it could be argued I would have the assetts in my house but a lot of them would be of no use to me.

Miranda

[factor-fiction]

Morning, Miranda- I see you have decided not to leave us and have asked your question. These threads usually get quite a few responses as you'll know.

[Mirandajane]

Hi factor30

I agree threads on care home fees get several responses and there has been many of them.
I have never been able to find a thead anything like this anywhere but I am sure I am not the first person to have this type of situation.

Miranda

[Fibonacci]

You might find it helpful to contact your local branch of Age UK who no doubt will have come across the issues your raise.
It also might be worth asking at Citizens Advice Bureau for some advice.

[jake-the-peg]

I dont believe so

There isn't any reason to believe she's about to need to go into a nursing home.

Problems only normally seem to arise when people are deliberately depleting their assets by giving away all their assets and then throwing themselves on the mercy of the state.


But I'd agree with Fibonacci that age UK would be a good set of people to talk to

[Coldicote]

Not an easy situation, but Mum should know of your concerns and might be able to contribute towards the cost of the things that need to be done - new bed, shower, etc. If I were in your position I would obtain estimates and talk to her about them and what the position would be if something unexpected happened (to either of you) and you could no longer look after her.

[Mirandajane]

Hi Coldicote

Mum is not bothered about the expenditure.
She just wants to avoid going into care.
She has visited a home which had people with dementia in and she had to stop off at a pub to recover her sanity and have a glass of brandy.
This was a few years ago and it had never happen before and never happened since.

Miranda

[jake-the-peg]

Yes it's a bit of a shock isn't it - I've just had to put my father into a nursing home - he has mild dementia but there are some with quite bad mental health issues as well as dementia.

However he has a lovely room with french windows out onto the patio and the staff are really brilliant with him and we see him most days.

But you wouldn't go into one if you didn't need to.

On a side note if it does come to it and you're self financing don't just take the price as red - I negotiated a 10% discount - the councils don't pay anything like what they ask you to because they have a lot of leverage sodo negotiate

[VHG]

>>>mute point.

Or even "moot point" :-)

[Mirandajane]

Hi Jake-the-peg.

Have you checked if your father is eligible for NHS funding.
I have done some reading up on this when

[Mirandajane]

Sorry previous answer continued

''when trying to find an answer to my question''.

[factor-fiction]

Mirandajane- you may want to read through this previous thread about deprivation of assets
http://www.theanswerb.../Question1101862.html

[jake-the-peg]

Yes - went through the NHS funding loop

There's an initial assment which is followed if that hurdle is jumped by a full assessment

You have to be in need of a pretty high level of care to be eligable for this and whilst I disagreed a bit with their inital assessments it wasn't enough to really make the difference and I think I'd have ended up having him poked and prodded without very much real prospect of a different decision

[Mirandajane]

Hi Fibonacci

I did contact Age Concern and they did suggest a second hand car and the advisor pointed out I would have the new bathroom in my home.
A bigger second hand car will cost more for tax / insurance / petrol etc and may not be worth much more when I change it the next time.
The present bathroom is only 7 years old and the man who came to give the quote said he could make it look very respectable for about £500 at the most and it would last another 7 years.
As I have said even though I am a pensioner I am 25 years younger than Mum and have no need of a lot of these adaptions for myself.
Yes I may have need at some point in the future but it is possible I may not be living in this house at that point in time.

Miranda

[factor-fiction]

This previous thread may also contain some replies you may find useful
http://www.theanswerb...3.html#answer-7026347

[Mirandajane]

Hi factor30

Thanks for your recent help.
My situation is different in the fact I totally own the house and should not be asked to sell it to fund my mother's care.
As it is 4 bedroom detached ( possibly 5 if you count an upstairs room which I use as a study which would take a double bed and a small wardrobe ) a social worker may tell me to downsize but I know I do not have to do this and will not.

Miranda

[factor-fiction]

Thanks but the Poulos thread was also about deprivation of assets to buy her new car for her to help support her mum

[Mirandajane]

Hi factor30

I will ask the GP if it would be worth having an O T assessment.
We have had sockets put higher as we have decorated some rooms and I think we have got to the point where the one's Mum is likely to need urgently are all done.
Mum now wants to go to a local cafe for lunch and to do a bit of shopping.
Oddly there is a Honda garage on our route and we will have a look in it today if Mum is OK to do so.

Miranda

[factor-fiction]

So maybe a Honda Jazz then?