50/50

[jaycee401]

my mother in law has been married to her husband 30 years, when they met she literally had nothing but 6 children he had a house which was paid for when his first wife died. Once they married they moved to a new house paid for and in the name of my husbands step father. My MIL now wants to end the marriage, the final straw being that they were having an argument, she was shaking her fists at him and he went to put her arms down and because her skin is tissue thin her skin ripped, to cut a long story short the neighbour took her to the hospital and the nurse advised her to contact the police, which she did, then they arrested him and questioned him but said no charges would be made. What rights would she have if she left the home. She is 77 and he is 84!! She is now saying that he has attacked her before but no-one in the family has any knowledge about this.

[cassa333]

I think she would be entitled to half the same as any wife. They have been together for too long for him to say it was my dead wifes money that bought xyz.

By her own admission he was just trying to get her arms down AND she has tissue thin skin so I can understand the police not taking it any further. It is easy to say after the fact that he has done it before but it is also easy for it to happen and not say anything so who knows on that one???

If she is determined to leave then she would have to be sure that she can (or the state) fund herself for what ever the future holds for a 77 year old. IE even with half the marital assets would she be able to afford to buy a small flat or rent comfortably or care fees etc. Is she spritely or infirm? does she actualy want the hassle of all the upheaval this will bring at her age? Do either of them have dementia or infirmaties that would be swallowed up with care fees? All this needs to be thought about if she is still wanting to leave.

[Androcles]

How sad! Can any of the six children intervene and act a s a mediator? To try and have a divorce at their time of life, with all the hassle, emotional strain and both having to find somewhere else to live will be extremely difficult - it cold kill one or both of them. Can't somebody talk some sense into them?

[jaycee401]

Thanks for replies. unfortunatley her 6 children (all adults) have different opinions, the 2 girls and my husband want her stay with her husband if poss as they know stepdad would never intentionally hurt her, the other 3 lads want her to leave and it is these who are puttin ideas in her head of getting assisted housing and moving into a warden controlled flat, but these lads live in other countries and do not see what we see living here. Both parents have all their faculties and to be honest I dont think she really would want all the upheavel but she seems to go along with whatever 'her boys' tell her. She is now wanting to make enquiries about assisted housing and whether she would be able to get help from the state, but I would of thought that because the property is owned outright valued about £175k she would have to fund it herself. I think if she stops getting hassle from the others and is left to think things out she may just stay put. But at the mo she seems to be going with the flow. My husband and his 2 sisters agree that if she wants to persue divorce and moving then she must do it herself and not make 'her boys' do it all for her. My husband is scared that if 'her boys' make all the plans for her and she moves, then once things have settled down she will regret it. Its such a shame that all the siblings do not get on with each other.