ABH

[ellajack]

Hi
On a night out recently my partner had a few too many to drink and pulled my hair, the police ended up getting involved and because he has a previous conviction of ABH (not against me, about a year and a half ago) he is not allowed to see or contact me for over a week until they decide whether to go to court or not, if it goes to court then he won't be released on bail until march. I really don't want any of this to happen and am not pressing any charges, of which I have told the police. Can they really take him to court just for pulling my hair?
Many thanks

[sara3]

yes, it's an act of violence.

what do you think he'll do next time he's had a few too many?

[Barmaid]

Unless he pulled clumps of your hair out or caused bruising, I doubt he will be charged with ABH - more likely common assault. Any application of unlawful force can result in a charge of common assault.

It is not for you to decide whether to press charges. It is for the CPS. Once you have made a complaint, it is out of your hands and you could be summonsed to Court as a witness for the prosecution.

[AlBags]

So he is locked up at the moment .... For pulling your hair?!
Or is it more serious than this?
Would this be in the public interest to pursue him through the courts in this instance of hair-pulling, where you have made no formal statement? and don't want to pursue it? I don't think so.... Unless he is still under some sort of Community Order from the previous incident.

[ellajack]

No there were no clumps or bruising on me. It is only one particular drink that makes him like that and he never usually drinks it. No not under any community order from previous conviction.

[ellajack]

Forgot to add no he's not locked up at the moment but isn't allowed to come home, after tues next week a decision will be made.

[AlBags]

ok .. "they" are probably looking for/hoping for "other evidence" from somewhere else like scene onlookers/workers, and awaiting advice from CPS ..... otherwise I would think they are wasting their time/court time, and public money in what many would regard as a minor aggressive/violent incident, even tho there is another previous. Best keep us informed then! : )

[gonzo00]

no doubt you will keep on making excuses for him until one day he really kicks your face in..then you'll be glad to have the police on your side...women like you make me sick...if he displays that sort of behaviour at any time drunk or not..he deserves to be shot in the face..it's scum like him that get all of us men a bad name...see you on the jeremy kyle show i suppose.

[AlBags]

All has been said is that he has pulled her hair and police were involved. He has a previous for ABH in an un-connected incident.
How can you people be so smarty-pants judgemental of him or her? Eh?
You are assuming far too much.

[gonzo00]

are you for real.....i suppose fred west was just a bit over protective!...the guy assaulted a woman....call me old fsahioned but if my own son done that i'd kick the living s**t out of him. there are certain things that a man son should never do....and that is no.1 on the list.

[ellajack]

hey I'm only asking for some advide and for your info I would never stay with anyone that hit or abused me thank you very much!! I'm not giving anyone a bad name if you don't like it don't comment and don't judge someone you don't know!!
Yes unfortunately it was stella and even the policeman recognised this has happened many times before with this drink.
Well apart from words being shouted that was all that happened, so it really does seem like a waste of time and money going to courtv- thank you for your helpfulvadvice

[AlBags]

Good luck : )

[fredpuli47]

You have to understand that cases of any kind of violence by one partner on another has to be taken seriously because there are many women who end up a lot worse than you have, in time, and there are a great many such women who don't see that they're gradually being controlled by the man until it's too late. Better safe than sorry is the motto in cases like this. This may not be your case at all, but many women keep persuading themselves that the man is a good sort and only gets violent when it's their fault or when he drinks a certain drink or any other reason. It's never' his fault'.He just can't help being that way.He's nice to them except when he isn't (and then it's not his fault)

[gonzo00]

well said fredpuli.

[AlBags]

He is absolutely correct of course .. but you and Eddie are jumping to too many conclusions. Read the facts stated, particularly the lady's last post.

[ellajack]

thank you and yes I know where you're coming from but we've been together for for nearly 8 years and this is the first ever thing thats happened, I'm not going to make excuses for him, we are very happy which is why I want this all over and back home with his family. Thank you for the concern and I know the police are just doing their job, just wanted to have a rough idea of what the outcome could be.