Spam & Scams0 min ago
I fancy a short holiday, what minor offences carry a guaranteed custodial sentence
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1. Commit any "either way" offence (ie can be tried by Magistrates or Crown Court).
2. Ask for your right to be tried by Jury (so the case goes to the Crown Court).
3. Once in the Crown Court, call His Honour The Judge a "senile old buffoon".
This can hardly be called serious, because it is probably a perfectly reasonable observation. However, you will be sent to prison for Contempt Of Court.
If you are merely chastised, increase your abuse until you receive the required "holiday".
NB. Do not try this in the Magistrate's Court. Technically, one cannot be in contempt of a Magistrate's Court. Magistrates are, quite literally, beneath contempt !
2. Ask for your right to be tried by Jury (so the case goes to the Crown Court).
3. Once in the Crown Court, call His Honour The Judge a "senile old buffoon".
This can hardly be called serious, because it is probably a perfectly reasonable observation. However, you will be sent to prison for Contempt Of Court.
If you are merely chastised, increase your abuse until you receive the required "holiday".
NB. Do not try this in the Magistrate's Court. Technically, one cannot be in contempt of a Magistrate's Court. Magistrates are, quite literally, beneath contempt !
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Did some guy not get sentenced to 6 months for stealing golf balls from a 'pond' on a golf course? A relatively victimless crime.
I used to work for DWP and once interviewed an old guy who lived rough. He said that he had spent the last five Christmases in prison - intentionally getting into trouble so that he had a good Christmas.
I used to work for DWP and once interviewed an old guy who lived rough. He said that he had spent the last five Christmases in prison - intentionally getting into trouble so that he had a good Christmas.
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