Sexual or emotional abuse?

[insidemyknee]

My stepdad used to watch me in the bath through a gap between the doorframes and I was too scared to move andget up and confront him about it. It happened for several months. So was that sexual or emotional abuse? I know that may sound like a silly question but he never touched me so maybe it wouldn't be called sexual abuse, but he never said anything to me about it so it wouldn't be called emotional abuse. Help?

[pooks123]

Anything that makes you feel uncomfy or bad about what happened is abuse. but i would also add that the fact that it made you feel bad is in effect making it worse,if you can put it behind you and move on i would urge you to do that otherwise you may end up beating yourself up for may years over something that you had no control over ,its like trying to hold a beach ball under the water it inevitably will keep popping up to take you by suprise. if you cn put it in a box on the shelf out of harms reach then maybe you will be able to move on with your life and just put it down to a nasty experience ,if you cant do that then please approach your GP and tell him/her how you feel and ask if you could have some counselling. in your future life 'occasionally in a down moment it will rise up and take you by suprise ,dont be afriad to ask again for help in these moments of your life

[insidemyknee]

Thankyou I don't know why but I've just always wanted to know. I don't think I want counselling though as I don't like to think or talk about it as it's easier just to try and forget. Thanks for your kind words.

[mullein1]

did you tell your mother? you are entitled to privacy and he should respect that..no decent person would spy on someone in the bath ..and its something you should address..i would definately tell someone either your mother or grandparents..

[mycatis]

Personaly I think that anything that is done for sexual gratification would be sexual abuse, after all forcing a child to watch porn (just an example) but not touching them, that would be sexual abuse. You have to speak to someone to help you get past this and I really hope that you dont feel bad or guilty about this, that you didnt stop it. It is in no way your fault.
Hope you are ok, x x x

[jno]

I think sexual abuse, though in a minor way - sorry, don't mean to belittle it, but sexual abuse comes in much worse varieties. You don't say how long ago this happened, or how old you were, but presumably it still preys on your mind a bit or you wouldn't have asked this question.

I don't think you will actually forget it, it's more a matter of putting it into proportion: it was one of thousands of things that happened to you while you were growing up. It may have left some mark on you (you're a bit wary of men perhaps? don't like being watched? shut the door tight before getting undressed?) but if this isn't impeding your life, then it suggests you've got over it for all practical purposes.

If it is impeding your life, counselling might help; but only you can decide if it's still causing you real problems that need addressing. But as mycatis says, the main thing to be aware of is that you've done nothing wrong.

[Octavius]

A bit of both really...

Sexual abuse involves forcing or enticing a child or young person to take part in sexual activities, whether or not the child is aware of what is happening. The activities may involve physical contact, including penetrative (e.g. rape or *******) or non-penetrative acts. They may include involving children in looking at, or in the production of, pornographic material, or encouraging children to behave in sexually inappropriate ways

Emotional abuse is the persistent emotional ill-treatment of a child causing severe and persistent adverse effects on the child's emotional development, often by making them feel they are worthless or unloved, inadequate, or valued only insofar as they meet the needs of another person, age or developmentally inappropriate expectations being imposed on children, causing children frequently to feel frightened, or the exploitation or corruption of children.