2 Questions

[dodedo]

Hi there everybody my first question is, my father has been looked after at home with dementia for the past few years,he has recently gone into care and has very advanced dementia, as a relative has power of attorney they are either selling his things from the house or giving them away, then intends to sell the house , all this is going into a pot to help pay for his care, is this person allowed to do this? my next question is, as the house has been sorted out its been discovered that things like my mums jewellery(who is deceased) and other things family have bought have gone missing and can not be found, the person with power of attorney doesn't seem that bothered by it, but should the police not be contacted and told of this? once dad passes away shouldn't everything go to probate as mum and dad had a joint will and all 5 of us are to get an equal share of everything, not that that bothers any of us as dad comes first, but as I live 400 miles away from everybody else and don't want to upset anyone before I say anything just thought i'd get a bit of feed back, many thanks peep's

[bhg481]

When my grandmother got dementia she was giving things away willy-nilly and her dementia wasn't bad. Your dad might have been doing the same; very difficult to prove otherwise.

[davebro]

I have no legal training but I would say that - yes the Power of Attorney can do what you say they are doing if it is in accordance with what the order states & no, it would be a waste of time going to the police. Even if there has been theft it would be very difficult to obtain any evidence & probing it would probably upset your father.

[dodedo]

Thanks for you're replies guys, you've both just confirmed what I thought in the first place, but my partner has been on at me to do something about it, I was sure things were being done in the right way and that maybe dad had given things away and not said, and like you say nothing can be really proved, I feel a little easier now, missing nights sleep over it all isn't good for anyone but maybe I shall rest a little easier now, again thank you so much

[bhg481]

As Davebro says, the whole idea of a PoA is to manage the financial affairs of someone who can't manage their own - we've given our daughter and grandsons PoA for us for that very reason. I think your relative should be very wary of GIVING things away though; much better to sell for a nominal amount and keep a record of everything.

[dodedo]

Everything is being recorded, things we buy for him he needs etc, but good idea about things being given away, they should all recorded too by the sounds so everyone knows where everything went, that way everyone knows where they stands and no come backs in the future

[woofgang]

If you do have concerns which aren't satisfied by speaking to the person who holds the POA, then you can report them here. I don't think you have given us enough information about whether or not you need to take further action. https://www.gov.uk/report-concern-about-attorney-deputy-guardian

[calmck]

Don’t know if this helps but when my stepfather died, his will provided equally for all children. Monies for anything sold was divided equally when probate settled.