ChatterBank2 mins ago
Marriage
* Marriages are made in heaven. But then again, so are thunder and lightning.
*If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
*Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!
*Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.
*When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
*Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
*Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something his wife said. After marriage, he will fall asleep before his wife finishes talking.
*Every woman wants a man who is handsome, understanding, economical and considerate, but the law allows only one husband.
*Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook, but the law allows only one wife.
*Man is incomplete until he marries. After that, he is finished.
*If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
*Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!
*Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.
*When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
*Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
*Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something his wife said. After marriage, he will fall asleep before his wife finishes talking.
*Every woman wants a man who is handsome, understanding, economical and considerate, but the law allows only one husband.
*Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook, but the law allows only one wife.
*Man is incomplete until he marries. After that, he is finished.
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