>>> when did they ever refund SD?
Sretiolc's point is, TTT, that her son will own two homes up until the point that he's sold his first one. So he'll be charged a higher rate of SDLT on the purchase than if he didn't already own a property.
As Sretiolc is aware, and TLC's link reiterates, when he sells the first property he'll then be able to reclaim the 'second home supplement' on the SDLT that he paid. That's all very well but, of course, he has to be able to fund that higher payment in the first place. Sretiolc is enquiring as to whether it's possible to simply pay a lower amount of SDLT in the first place, rather than to pay the higher amount and then reclaim the difference.
Unfortunately, Sretiolc, that's the way that the system works. He has to pay the second home SDLT within 14 days of completion on the sale. So, unless he's sold his own house by then, he'll have to find the money (possibly by way of a short-term bank loan) to pay that SCDLT in full or risk getting clobbered for a potentially heavy penalty for not doing so.
Sorry!