Need some advice

[djs76]

I split from my partner in 2005. Since then i had regular contact with my daughter. I would have her for 4 weeks sometimes 6weeks in one go. Everything was arranged between the pair of us and i was paying child maintenance. However things started to get suspicious and i instantly thought a new bloke was on the scene.
My suspicions were proved correct and then the problems started.
He wouldn't let me see my daughter, he threatened that as well as the maintenence payments i had to pay for their heating bills, his car, the reasons behind this was so that my daughter would be warm and he could ferry her round in his car that i would have payed to get fixed!!! He was (and still is) using my daughter against me like a pawn. They have moved and wont tell me where they live. Everytime i try to get in contact i get abusive messages telling me where to go. He has changed my ex partners bank details so the child maintenance has stopped. I desperately want to see my daughter again and set the maintenance up again but i have no idea where they live. I cant believe that my ex partner is letting him do this.
I have parental rights as she was born after 2003 and my name is on the birth certificate. Surely i have a right to now where she is??

(the mother has since told me that they are moving abroad) can she do this without my consent?
Would appreciate any help on this matter. There is more to the story but too much to write.
regards

[burt one]

really don't know what to advise you! but just wanted to say good luck! i really hope that you get something sorted for yours and your daughters sake! all the best.

[yummymum]

i would say to ring child benifit if she is claiming and saying she doesnt know where you are (which is likely) then they will be glad of a phone call from you and they maybe able to help with her whereabouts, also i would contact the citezens advice they are usually very helpful. If it was me a would pull out all the stops...try contact either of them through work places if you know them, another idea would be to search the electrol roll this cost a little bit but it maybe worth it. Good luck xxx

[bubblegum-31]

i havent got a clue what advice i could give you other than to go asap to a solicitor and seek legal advice. fathers have rights also and judging by what you have wrote you seem like a really devoted dad. i really do hope things work out for you in the future and that you get the access to your daughter that you deserve.........good luck and take care

[chitchat]

She cannot take your daughter out of the country without your written permission - thats providing she doesnt have full legal custody (court order) of your daugther.

Put all the maintenace money into a savings account until things are sorted.

But more importantly go and see a solicitor. If you ex has changed so much since this person (I wouldnt call him a man) has moved in you really do need to show them that you cannot be bullied into their unreasonable demands. Please seek legal advice for both you and your daughters sake.

Finally I hope you get this sorted - they are being cruel to both you and your daughter. Love is blind and your ex certainly appears to be with her new bloke in tow.

Good Luck xxx

[fayelc123]

My boyfriends ex threatened to move abroad with his daugther & he went straight to a solicitor.
He then went to court within about 2 weeks & she was then told that she cannot take the child out of the country without his permission.
Please go to a solicitor asap. Good luck!!!

[lady_p_gold]

First of all I would advise you always to remain calm and methodical (I know you are probably incensed and feel like murder but try to curb it!) and set up an account in which you can pay the maintenance payments until such time as either things change, or it is requested again. If he is such a horrible guy then it seems to me he would want to have the money coming in, but he is obviously a jealous and paranoid person. Now if he is this controlling I feel it will only be a matter of time before hopefully the relationship will falter. You need to be the rock that is always there for your daughter. If necessary write her a letter from time to time and also keep that. You will have them to show her later. Never give up. As advised go to a solicitor and above all do not ever sink to their level. If you get a chance, tell your ex wife that you will always love your daughter and that when she comes to her senses you will be there still. Good luck

[djs76]

Thanx for your advice. its appreciated.
I cant tell my ex anything as i dont have any numbers or addresses for her. the only number that i do have, her new man answers it all the time.AGHHHH!!!!!