Custody dilemma

[TnKej]

I have a 5 year old daughter who has been living with me for the past 6 months. Her mother lives in another borough and can't take care of her partly due to the fact that she is an illegal immigrant and also 4 months pregnant for her boyfriend. I have recently got my daughter's Naturalisation certificate and subsequently her British Passport. Upon breaking up for school this Xmas her mother came to my house and took my daughter. I'm fed up of the ping pong situation as she only wants her when it's convenient and the police say that the mother is the most appropriate custodian. It took me a long time to get her settled into her current routine and she's doing well at school. I have resisted going through the courts for fear that the mother might get deported. Could you kindly suggest the best way to get access to my daughter so as the mother can't take her out of the country without my knowledge?

[Velvetee]

I would say you probably do need to go through the courts. For one thing, your daughter needs stability and this backwards and forwards situation is unhealthy for her.

Your daughter needs a permanant home with regular visits with her mother. If the mother is an illegal immigrant, there is a liklihood she may be deported and take your daughter with her. You shouldn't leave it to fate and wait to see what happens. At the very least speak to a Family law solicitor and know what your rights are.

[bednobs]

you need to go through the courts - you cannot change a persons behaviour.
BTW i dont understand why being an illegal immigrant and/or pregnant stops someone from looking after a child
anyway, if you threaten with courts she might be reasonable

[onlyme26]

if she is illegelly in the country then she WILL get deported if found out, but as far as im aware if the child was born in this country then you are the legal guardian ( unless your illegal to???) she can go to court for her child but again thats not what you want,

she cant just come and take the child when ever she pleases, she needs to think about the childs needs, if the child is settled then its wrong for her to do this, plus if she gets arrested or found out where does that leave the child??? with the new boyfriend????

i think if i were you, i would be heavy handed and explain the child is settled with you and that if she doesnt stop upsetting the situation you will seek legal advise which may lead to her being deported, sounds harsh i know, but if the child really is better off and settled with you it needs to be done.


i dont understand anything about illegal imigrants, i dont know why they come and laws about it so i shouldnt comment, but i think coming over and getting pregnant twice is a bit silly coz like i said before as far as im aware if she gets deported the child will not automatically go with her, so she could loose her children and have to fight to get them back,

[TnKej]

Thanks for the advice. At the time I got my then partner pregnanat I wasn't aware of her immigration status. I'm a British citizen and feel a bit upset that if I go through the courts there is a likelyhood that my daughter might have to leave the country with her mother. Also I've been informed that I could be looking at a hefty bill. It is one of the reasons I've hesitated against such actions for so long. Crunch time is next week when school resumes. My daughter's teachers will contact me if she doesn't turn up and I will have no choice but to tell them about her mother's actions. I was wondering if anyone knows the procedure for child access rights i.e. I want to file for the right to see my child through the courts without using a lawyer.
Cheers