I take it you are in England?
Your daughter is entitled to a share in the estate. I would write to the administrators and ask for a copy of the estate accounts quoting s25 Administration of Estates Act 1925 and threaten that if they do not provide them within 21 days you will seek a summons at the Probate Registry. Although that will not give you the money, it may a) concentrate their minds and b) make them realise you are not going to go away.
if they are spending it on themselves, it sounds to me like there are unequal distributions being made so I might be inclined to seek legal advice on behalf of your daughter.