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DOUG666STING | 23:41 Thu 27th Jul 2006 | Film, Media & TV
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can you tell me some of the funniest jokes ever
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What's brown and runny?

Kelly Holmes.
My brother-in-law has a wonderful Doctor. He gave him 6 months to live. When he couldn't pay his bill,he gave him another 6 months . Boom boom.
Whom shall he marry?

A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.
The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon and gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.
The man was impressed.
The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.
Again, the man is impressed.
The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.
Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with
the money he'd given her.
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Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.
Men are like that, you know.
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
PMSL

Just sent that one round the office. Love it ;-D
a man walks into a bar and says 'OW'

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