Feeling Down :-(

[natalie_1982]

Hi everyone, I am ten weeks along and am feeling really crap at the moment. Asides from being spotty, sleepy, moody, bloated, (sounds like the seven dwarfs so far!) and sore boobed, also I feel differently towards a friend of mine. Well someone I thought was a friend but is actually being an out-and-out b*tch at the moment.

I am 24 and she is 32, she is single and has no children but wants to have the whole Brady bunch lifestyle. We were very close friends but since I found out I was pregnant she doesn't want to spend any time with me or anything, no emails, texts or calls anymore, and it is not because I talk baby, baby, baby all the time because I am actually very paranoid about the pregnancy going wrong and so don't mention it to anybody unless they ask me something specifically!

It's getting me down and really quite angry to be honest, because I was good enough to spend time with before but nowhave been dropped like a hot potato, and I really feel like I want to pick her up on it but am paranoid it is my hormones making me think she is being weird, or maybe I have changed and make her feel like she cannot approach me? Any comments would be welcome x

[4getmenot]

Leave her to it, sounds to me she is jealous and no-one needs friends like that especially you at this time, dont let yourself get stressed

[natalie_1982]

Thanks 4get, that's what I'd say to somebody else but when it is you in that position it is easy to doubt yourself!

[4getmenot]

well if you say she's dropped you like a hot potato not much you can do anyway, leave it for a while if she values your friendship she'll come back, just dont let her walk all over you, dont put up with it.

[natalie_1982]

She has been in touch briefly but only to discuss her non-existent love-life. This guy has been messing her around for months (since way before I even found out I was pregnant), they've been on and off and on and off, and I have been telling her to get shot of him for good if he doesn't want what she wants (basically marriage and kids), but now she has hooked back up with him and so when we do speak all she does is go on about what an a*sehole he is, and ironically, how he only ever wants to spend time with her when nobdy else is available. Erm, pot....kettle?

[jno]

Well, if she calls you can always tell you you can't talk because you're doing Sarbanes-Oxley exercises to strengthen your pubic myalgia or something and she'll hastily hang up in distaste.

I just made that up, Sarbanes-Oxley is to do with American corporate governance rather than pregnancy but she'll never know...

[warpig3]

natalie I had a very good friend who reacted exactly like that and I was completely gobsmacked. But I let it go and she came round. Basically as I understand it, peoples reaction is based on how it will affect them and their lives/relationship with you. With my friend I believe there was a certain amount of jealously too, although she is not normaly a jealous person, she is now 46, has no children and I genuinely believe this came to her as a complete shock.

Give her time and don't be too hard on her for now. I bet she comes round totally and if not, then perhaps its no great loss. You have enough feelings and emotions to be dealing with at the moment, why burden yourself with her attitude, be a little selfish yourself, you are the one who is pregnant.

Good luck
warpig.

[4getmenot]

unfortunately there are some people in life who when you may have a problem they turn it around to their 'bigger' problems. Just smile and ignore her. xx

[andrea81]

The only thing you need to worry about is keeping you and your baby happy and healthy, don't put effort into people who are making you unhappy.

She'll need you before you need her and I bet you she will see her ways and come to you. don't stress honey!

[nat_84]

hey Natalie - like everyone else has said it defo sounds like jeaoulsy on your friends part - babies are a sensative subject as people feel so passionately about it. I barely heard froma friend of mine durng my pregnancy and once Mia was born and i assumed it was beacsue she was sooooo broody and has has always dreamed of having a little girl...

But leave people to their own devices, as rightly said above you and your baby are the most important thing right now.

pregnancy does get tough and (to be frank) makes you feel like $hit but trust me when i say it will pass by and the next thing you know you'll have a little gorgeous baby in your arms that makes you smile EVERYDAY!!!

Stay well and take care x