I'm in trouble.......

[Mr Tall]

Went on the **** yesterday down the Thames watching the London Marathon. Met a mate at the finish line and went for a few beers as you do. Come about 9 o clock and about 12 pints later I can hardly speak - My pal took me home. My missus is ****** at me and puts me to bed. At about 11.30 I get up and try to take a sh*t in the laundry basket, she screams at me and marches me to the toilet. I then somehow take a wrong turn out of the toilet go downstairs to my downstairs neighbours house open the front door go down their stairs and into their bed and go to sleep. My missus wakes up when my neighbours come home from the pub and the wife is screaming to her husband that a strange man is sleeping in their bed. My missus comes rushing down and finds me curled up in my neighbours bed with them freaking out trying to wake me up. Lisa has to pull me up with me in just my boxers and take me back upstairs. This morning I wake up and luckily find a note on my door from the woman downstairs saying please don't be embarrassed it was the funniest thing that has ever happened to them in the whole time they had lived there. So do you think a bottle of wine and an apology cover this

[crete]

forget about the neighbours, what about your wife, is she laughing this morning ?

[PinkFizz]

God that is sooooo funny!!!! Can't stop laughing!!

[Katie~77]

Yes.x

[happyred]

That is funny! My partner once decided to get up at 4am, after drinking forabout 12 hours, and take a p*** in the wardrobe! I was not a happy bunny at the time, but now i think back, it does make me chuckle! And i've vowed never to let him forget it!!

[meaty]

Are you sure the shxt went in the basket it sounds to me like it stayed in and come through your gob. I smell something is cows no sheep no ow its bull shxt what a load of bxllacks you just want attention what a wnker shove the wine up your arxe

[meaty]

Look its all the stupid cows who beleive this tosxa

[Katie~77]

Meaty, don't be shy. Say what you really think!x

[happyred]

Meaty, are you having a bad morning, or just not got a sense of humour?!!

[redcrx]

who wants attention meaty??? :)

lol @ the story, embelished or not, it was at least amusing.

[PinkFizz]

Well after having a dad that used to sleepwalk and was found on our front bench stark naked by the milkman yes I can say that this is probably true!! ( my poor mother!)

[happyred]

Sorry Pinkfizz, that made me laugh too!! lol But i do feel for your mum! x

[Mr Tall]

This is no ******** I don't know how I can make you believe me but I not bothered if you don't.

My misses is ****** at me she hasn't shouted at me yet bit I suppose that will come. I am now banned from drinking, am not allowed to go to my work do on friday and am going to hear about this for the rest of my life when I plead to be allowed out with the boys

[meaty]

Yeahh it is a funny story but I talk straight this guy probably aint a wxxnker and that isnt aimed at him personally just at the story hes wrote blokes get it more than women they can call each other wnkers and not mean it and not take offence unless hes a wimp

[meaty]

You dint take offence did ya mr tall and maby after 12 pints as I am a gallon man 8 pints thats it and I probaly do the same if I took it futher ignore me I just speak my mind I did once have 21 pints when I went to a racing day out but that was starting at 6am and finishing at a night club at 3am with a huge sunday dinner and fish and chips for tea

[Mr Tall]

No offence taken meaty I don't know why I was so wasted probably because I hadnt eaten and had a few spliffs and it was a hot day and cos I'm a muppet.

[Katie~77]

And they all lived happily ever after! Why can't all AB disagreements be resolved so quickly???x

[B00]

Why do men do this? I've never yet heard of a woman being so drunk she's thought something else was a toilet?

My friends ex once went out on Christmas Eve, got so pickled that when he came home he mistook their daughter's christmas toy pram (set up ready for the morning) for the loo and peed in it.

[redcrx]

my best mates fella almost wee'd in her kitchen bin, fair enough if he was drunk but he was SOBER! He was so engrossed in fitting their kitchen that he forgot to actually go to the bathroom.

[whiffey]

I once knew a woman who used to get so drunk she would regularly pee in the flower beds in the front garden on the way home from the pub. Lovely salvias every year and it kept the slugs away.

[dee5]

That made me laugh out loud!! I think a bottle of wine and an apology for your neighbours should be fine and maybe a bottle of wine some flowers and a slap up meal might start making amends with your wife! A friend of mine always brings his girlfriend home something when he is out on the p*ss, normally it is a traffic cone or a sign from something and he has to wake her up to show it to her!!