The Two Ronnies

[Ken4155]

The Two Ronnies first aired on 10 April 1971 - 50 years ago! While the census of opinion is that the 'Four Candles' sketch was their Bohemian Rhapsody, their Chandelier, they also produced quite a few other little gems. Here's just a few.
"Tomorrow we'll be talking to women who like Nicholas Parsons."
"And to a parson who likes nickerless women.

"On a packed show tonight, we'll be talking to an out of work contortionist who can no longer make ends meet."

And we'll be speaking to the disillusioned vet who, in James Herriot style, is writing his memoirs under the working title of, 'All Creatures Grunt And Smell."

"There was a fire at the Inland Revenue offices in London but it was put out before any serious good was done."

And my favourite; "West London police wish to alert local residents about the activities of the infamous cross-eyed burglar. If you see this man staring in your windows, warn the people next door."

[mushroom25]

[naomi24]

Superb!

[aelmpvw]

https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/ronnie_barker_326985

[elliemay1]

Lol especially the last one!

[rowanwitch]

The term comedy genius is applied far to readily, The two Ronnies, and more specifically Ronnie Barker really deserve to be spoken of as such.

[Togo]

[Buenchico]

Let's remember where it all began, on The Frost Report:

[Togo]

Plus the skit about a lorry full of onions turning over on the M1 and a police spokesman recommending that motorists should look for a hard shoulder to cry on.

[Zacs-Master]

The
"F.U.N.E.X."
"S.V.F.X"

Was my all time favourite.

[Atheist]

Eccentric poet in the sixties called Bob Cobbing (I think).
L O, R U A N M E?
S, I M N N M E
O! I C U R A N M E
and so on.....

[Zacs-Master]

Sigh. Is nothing original.

[Togo]

Never get away with this now, even as mockery.

[Jackdaw33]

Am I wrong of is the barmaid a very young Sarah Lancashire? If not she's the spitting image of her.

[Togo]

Oh how we laughed at the absurdity. It is compulsory now.

[Buenchico]

^^^ The Two Ronnies ran from April 1971 to December 1987, Jack. Sarah Lancashire didn't graduate from Guildhall School of Music and Drama until 1986, with here first TV credit on IMDb not being until 1988, so unless that sketch is from very close to the end of series (and she never received a credit for appearing in it), I doubt that she's the actress you see.

[Togo]

"Every single town will be bypassed so you can drive all day without going anywhere."

[Stephen_G]

I know this in only Ronnie B, but this is one of my favourites - I doubt that I'd keep a straight face...

[Jackdaw33]

You're probably right; I was just struck by the resemblance.

[JimF]

[ToraToraTora]

4 candles was not their best work, it's a great sketch but not a patch on the Mastermind sketch.