Mre explaining..I need help. 2nd to "CHEER ME UP?"

[-Em-mE-]

We broke up cuz he is too busy to give me full time..he says its unfair to me....cuz he has his senior year, he has colleges too forcast and look for, he has football everyday, he soccer on the weekends, he and I go to diff schools, he would have no time to be there and it would just not be fair. He leaves everyday at 6am and gets home at like 8pm, Plus his parents are going through a divorce and he is having a really hard time with that.

At first he said he is still in love with me and wants to be in a relationship but he cannot at this point and is not emotionally ready...Than later I asked him agin and he said to me "Im sorry but I am not in love with you anymore, Em." I had no idea that was coming, especially considering that he and I had an AWESOME relationship, we had been together almost 7 months, broke up once b4 and at that time he also said "i love you but im not inlove with you anymore" BUT when we got back together he said he was in love the whole tim but was masked with confusion.

He is a very good guy, always has been honest with me, an d true to us. Nut why would he say that? I honestly dont beleive that he has no feelings anymore, 1 week before we were still saying I love you...HECk...2 days b4 we were!

I just beleive that he has so much going on and cannot focus on us and doesnt know anything on that aspect anymore...because...that has happened before.

But the thing is...is that he and I are literally best friends. We still call each other, text, hang out and everything...Whats the deal?

[Sasha13]

I'm sorry hun, and I'm sure this isn't what you want to hear, but if a guy says he isn't ready for a relationship, or he loves you but isn't in love with you, then it's not going to work out - he doesn't feel that strongly for you. Believe me, I've learned this the hard way.

He's still being friendly with you for one of two reasons. 1 he doesn't want to hurt you because he doesn't want you to think badly of him or 2. he doesn't want to burn his bridges with you in case he decides at some point in the future that it's now convenient to resume a relationship (until the next time that he wants his freedom, when he'll tell you the same thing that he's told you twice before - he loves you but isn't in love with you).

This makes it harder for you - you're still hanging out, so he must be in love with you right? Wrong sweety. This isn't going to go anywhere - it can't. You need to try to give yourself some space away from this guy so that you can rebuild your life.

Please don't make the same mistake that I did when I was younger and waste a year of my life pining for someone that I'd convinced myself must really like me because he was always calling me and texting me, to find out that he was using me all along - as soon as someone came along that he really liked he dropped me like a hot iron.

Take control of this situation yourself, explain to him that you enjoy his company but that you're getting mixed messages and you feel it would be better if you didn't see each other. Then take some time to get over him, and when you're ready start dating other people.

Good luck! x

[-Em-mE-]

ok but the thing is...is that...he actually is like. my best friend. It kinda sucks....he said this exact thing "Em, I need you around still, we have to stay close, your my number 1 and 2. everyone else comes later."
Like...Its tough...but I have had to deal with it before too. I told him I am not just gonna wait around for him, that I have to stand my ground and I am not gonna just "wait for him until he is ready" thats ridiculous. And needy and YEAH! I am still loveing this guy...but I cannot just be "reserved"

[lizzydrippin]

Aw Em, you sound like such a sweetheart! I don't think that you can walk away from this guy for one minute, it'd be just too hard. It wouldn't hurt to just back off a little though, try not being so 'available' to him just when he needs you around. Start spending some time with other friends. He may need the shock of you not being there whenever he wants to hang out with you. Everything can change very quickly just by your attitude shifting a little. Give it a try.

[Kimmiebear]

I can't cheer you up much, but I can say that I broke up with my b/f who was a great friend of mine for years because we didn't make time for each other- it was so hard, for both of us. We got through it and are on speaking terms and would still be friends but I moved away to go to school.
It is hard to do, but when the end is there don't hold back. If you are not ready to let go then I would try backing off a but as suggested above and see what happens. He might move on before you, or there might be someone for you just around the next corner. Don't abandon each other, but don't give each other false hope either. And DON"T lead each other on.

[Reverandfunk]

I would say that you are fairly young, go out have fun your whole life is ahead of you don't get tied down