hypothetical - just curious...?

[joko]

many years ago, i was staying at a families house for about 3-4 days, as my boyfriend was invited to their daughters wedding as a friend of the groom, and as an usher...it was in london so i went too and stayed over.

they were, lets just say a bit of a chav family - think marginally better than jeremy kyle guests...anyway, they were perfectly kind etc and i was happy to do dishes, hoover etc - and even bought them a set of picture frames as a thank you gift for allowing us to stay - however at one point the other daughter told us that she'd had to convince her father not to demand that we thoroughly clean the oven and the toilet... i told her i would have refused...
i was disgusted, and felt it was a step too far and that he was just taking the Fosters and taking liberties, trying to get out of doing the jobs we all hate...he seemed a bit of a bullyboy chancer type
had he stated beforeheand what he expected i would not have stayed over - we didnt have too - we only went early because the groom wanted a hand and some friends with him

what do you think?
do you think hed have been justified in asking us to do this?
would you have refused or done it?
how much is too much?

im just curious really, i am not asking for advice etc.

[ummmm]

Not very good hosts were they?

It's good manners to offer to help with the general tasks like dishes etc....it's bad manners to expect guests to do anymore than that. IMO..

[daffy654]

I wouldn't expect over-night guests to do any housework, never mind things like clean the loo and oven.

[joggerjayne]

OMG ... I think he was behaving appallingly.

A guest is a guest.

As the host, your must make your guests feel at home, and look after them.

A courteous host does not expect his/her guests to do little chores.

On the contrary ... one should make sure that one's guests feel no obligation to do chores.

As you have said ... this family sound terribly chavy.

Let me guess ... when you arrived, on your beds were fresh towels, soaps, shampoo and conditioners, new toothbrushes and some moisturisers? No? Well, why am I not surprised.

[annie0000]

Are you sure he wasn't just trying to wind you up?

Sounds like a joke to me. However, if he had been serious I would have made a joke of it and not done it. The most I would expect from house guests is to have kept their room presentable and pitched in with dishes/cooking as and when. But that depends on who they are, family and friends I wouldn't expect to do anything, if I was doind someone a favour than I would expect the above.

[pink-kittens]

As daffy, overnight guests would not be expected to help with housework or cooking etc never mind cleaning the loo and oven.

[McMouse]

Given this is a hypothetical question I feel comfortable asking why you would refuse to clean the oven and toilet after you had left them in such a dreadful condition.

[joggerjayne]

Mouse ...

Even if joko had messed them up (which I doubt) ... a host should cover up and deal with one's guests' shortcomings ... not draw attention to them.

[Sqad]

If....if.....guests had left the toilet in what I would call an "unacceptable" condition ( I am not suggesting that joko+boyfriend did) then I would say guests or no guests:

"Here is the toilet brush here is the bleech, now get on with it"

[joggerjayne]

Wrong, sqad.

One should discreetly clean up after them, and not mention it.

[Sqad]

JJ...in your opinion it is wrong.

In my opinion it is not.

I would NOT "discreetly" clean the toilet after anyone had used it.

[joggerjayne]

But sqad ... you must.

You are the host.

[mccfluff]

could you imagine the fun you would have.....

[Sqad]

JJ indeed i am the "host" not a toilet attendant.

It would not bother me if I had indeed insulted them by asking them to clear up the toilet mess, as I would not consider inviting them again.

[joggerjayne]

Obviously, if the guest was No_Kno ... he could clean it up himself, LOL

[Sqad]

fluffy peoples idea of "fun" varies.

Some like to get p1ssed, tell jokes that everyone has heard before, get louder and more vulgar as the evening goes on.

Some people like to put play music, dance and fill the room with cigarette smoke.

Some people like a good meal and good intelligent conversation.

So you see, some people MAY have and have had "fun" staying at the sqad's house......you never know.