Turpentine versus Holy Water
A little boy was sitting on the footpath with a bottle of Turpentine. He was shaking it up and watching all the bubbles.
A Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had.
The little boy said, 'This is the most powerful liquid in the world; it's called Turpentine.'
The Priest said, 'No, the most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water. If you rub it on a pregnant woman's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby.'
The little boy replied, 'That's all very well, but if you rub turpentine on a cat's arse, he'll pass a Harley Davidson !'