Crosswords3 mins ago
Burglars? What a damned near dangerous racket!
7 Answers
Me and the missus have a few days off work so went out shopping came home around lunchtime. I was lying down upstairs having a nap as i had a dodgy gut probably from the full english breakfast i had in a new cafe i went to this morning.
She came in the room and started a conversation with me which i didn't hear a word of as i was asleep and she never checks to see whether i'm fully awake before launching into one of her many rants, local gossip or breakdown of every boring item she had bought or wanted to buy at some point.
I heard her say goodbye and heard the door slam and her voice shouting down the phone to her friend as she walked down the street so then i covered my head with the duvet and settled off to what i thought was going to be a nice relaxing sleep after my battle with the toilet earlier for at least 2 hours as my body tried to repel whatever unholy toxins had entered my body.
Roughly an hour later i was rudely awoken by the sounds of smashing glass, i thought i had been dreaming and sat up but i heard it again and leaped out of bed and grabbed by bat. I opened the door slowly and listened out to hear where the burglars were and stepped into the hallway with my hear beating in my mouth, so i thought, well this is it, i don't know whether they're armed or whether there are more than one but no one's going to walk off with my goods so i got halfway down the stairs and heard more smashing from the back door and weird noises from the front and figured they probably weren't in yet so i can catch them by surprise so i shouted something like ""Mark let's get them!" and jumped down the flight of stairs and ran into the living room then the kitchen where the smashing noise was coming from and looked at the open window and seen a glass mobile swinging in the wind where this "Smashing" noise was coming from, i went to the window which was open and then checked the toilet, understair cupboard where i saw a bamboo mobile near the front door making a noise, so i phoned the missus and asked her what the hell were these things? She replied "Door chimes, one crystal and one wood!
WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME! I bloody thought we had burglars! She said she did when i was in bed, which i obviously couldn't hear as i was BLOODY ASLEEP!
I've looked these door chimes up on the internet and cannot for the life of me understand why the hell you'd want something that makes a racket whenever the wind blows and if you live in a wind tunnel like me it bloody sounds like someone's breaking in or doing something weird.
Do any of you have these contraptions? What exactly is it's purpose apart from scaring the living daylights out of people?
I honestly nearly had a heart attack today and now need a good rest after i use the toilet.
She came in the room and started a conversation with me which i didn't hear a word of as i was asleep and she never checks to see whether i'm fully awake before launching into one of her many rants, local gossip or breakdown of every boring item she had bought or wanted to buy at some point.
I heard her say goodbye and heard the door slam and her voice shouting down the phone to her friend as she walked down the street so then i covered my head with the duvet and settled off to what i thought was going to be a nice relaxing sleep after my battle with the toilet earlier for at least 2 hours as my body tried to repel whatever unholy toxins had entered my body.
Roughly an hour later i was rudely awoken by the sounds of smashing glass, i thought i had been dreaming and sat up but i heard it again and leaped out of bed and grabbed by bat. I opened the door slowly and listened out to hear where the burglars were and stepped into the hallway with my hear beating in my mouth, so i thought, well this is it, i don't know whether they're armed or whether there are more than one but no one's going to walk off with my goods so i got halfway down the stairs and heard more smashing from the back door and weird noises from the front and figured they probably weren't in yet so i can catch them by surprise so i shouted something like ""Mark let's get them!" and jumped down the flight of stairs and ran into the living room then the kitchen where the smashing noise was coming from and looked at the open window and seen a glass mobile swinging in the wind where this "Smashing" noise was coming from, i went to the window which was open and then checked the toilet, understair cupboard where i saw a bamboo mobile near the front door making a noise, so i phoned the missus and asked her what the hell were these things? She replied "Door chimes, one crystal and one wood!
WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME! I bloody thought we had burglars! She said she did when i was in bed, which i obviously couldn't hear as i was BLOODY ASLEEP!
I've looked these door chimes up on the internet and cannot for the life of me understand why the hell you'd want something that makes a racket whenever the wind blows and if you live in a wind tunnel like me it bloody sounds like someone's breaking in or doing something weird.
Do any of you have these contraptions? What exactly is it's purpose apart from scaring the living daylights out of people?
I honestly nearly had a heart attack today and now need a good rest after i use the toilet.
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