Christmas Joke
I've never liked the Englishman, Irishman, Scotchman jokes, but here goes anyway........
An Englishman, Irishman and Scotchman arrive at the Pearly Gates just before Christmas, and St Peter is there to greet them.
St Peter informs them "You have all led fairly unremarkable lives so, as we are approaching Christmas, if any of you are able to invoke the spirit of Christmas, I il let yoyu pass into everlasting life.
The Englishman produces his car keys from one pocket and his house keys from the other, jangling both in front of the guardian of the gates. St Peter asks "What is this?" and the Englishman replies "It is a mixture of the church bells at Christmas calling the faithful to worship and the sleigh bells as Rudolph leads his team of reindeer to deliver the children's presents".
St Peter smiles and says "Enter my son"
The Scots guy begins to panic as he thinks of a representation of Christmas and, just as St Peter asks him, he produces two cigarette lighters, one in each hand. "What is this?" asks St Peter and he replies "It is the eternal light guiding all Christians. It is also the lights of Christmas candles all over the world, symbolising hope and joy".
St Peter smiles again and says "Enter my son"
Finally, it is the Irishman's turn, and he produces from his pockets a bra, nipple clamps and a rather large magic wand.
"What is the meaning of this?" asks St Peter?
Paddy replies, "They're Carol's"!