Recalcitrant Teens

[EcclesCake]

My neice has not sent me a thank you for her Christmas present. She has had a ticking off by my brother but for some stubborn, teenage reason cannot be bothered acknowledging receipt and thanking me.

Over lunch with my brother I casually said that she shouldn't be surprised if she doesn't get a gift. He agreed that it would be a perfectly acceptable response to her ignorance.

I'm in two minds; I don't want to the wicked aunt but I also think she needs to buck up her ideas.

So, over to you guys - what would you do?

[B00]

Thank you for Christmas present? You sent it in October?

[Bazile]

Cut her out of the will

[Baldric]

I would give it a miss this year!

[SirOracle]

Fairly normal behaviour from a teenager,Eccles.A

Think it reflects a bit on the recipient's parents though.

[jennyjoan]

I never got a thank you for years but I do get a little something (little present) from most of my nephews now.

Many many years I never got a thank you but I always accepted that it was par for the course for teenagers.

However do believe that manners need to be taught even to teenagers by their parents (they still have to be reminded).

No I wouldn't stop giving her a present.

[EcclesCake]

Last years Christmas pressie Boo.....

Now toying with whether she gets one this year, it could be a valuable lesson as her sister did send thanks and will be getting her New Look voucher as usual....

[gness]

Difficult one, Eccles.....I know a gift isn't given for a thank you.....but it's annoying not to get a thank you so you at least know the gift has arrived...

This happened to me last year....when I was next speaking to the parent I asked him to pass on a message....

That Aunt G had a good lottery win which she was sharing with all the kids who thanked her for their Christmas present....

They still don't know whether or not I did....but I bet I get a thank you call this year......☺

[Prudie]

Because I feel guilty that I didn't force my daughter to do this (too much hassle at the time) I'd have to say give her a gift but on the understanding that you brother (not her) knows it will be the last time if you don't get a thank you.

[jennyjoan]

the way I look at is it is only once a year for the sake of whatever amount voucher. Not a big deal.

[TonyV]

Eccles you could be digging yourself a very deep hole and causing upset between your nieces. Depends on family dynamics and if your brother and sister in law can deal with it

[anneasquith]

if it's so important to you to receive a '' thank-you card from her, don't bother,

[woofgang]

I don't expect thank you letter, but a text, a chat, something. Its up to you, but keep in mind, you have said it yourself, she is a teenager and therefore not normal :) How sorry would you be to lose touch with her?

[B00]

Oh I see, sorry.

Has she had a birthday since then? Did you get her anything then? Did she not verbally thank you for the present?

[Sqad]

Such an easy solution to a common modern problem..........one doesn't send them presents.

[EcclesCake]

Some interesting answers.

I'm not really after a 'thank you', albeit a polite response......I want an acknowledgement of receipt!

They have both been brought up to send thanks and they haven't this year the older one did get her act together but the younger one is being stubborn and I am inclined to be equally stubborn and not buy her a gift this year.

It won't cause any ripples my Brother can see where I'm coming from and I'm pretty sure my SIL will get the drift too......hopefully grumpy niece will catch on too!

[Mosaic]

Make the cheque for the gist anount to the Salvation Army, in her name. They will love her for ever, and your gift will be well used.

[Mosaic]

Gist anount? say wot?

[DTCwordfan]

scale them and deliberately so, the one who sent the thanks getting the much nicer present, the recalcitrant one something 'notional.'

[gness]

You could make some fun out of it, Eccles......send a humerous note saying you are Christmas shopping.....as hers didn't arrive last year you're not risking sending one this year...but hope she has a Happy Christmas...x

[jno]

nobody has to give presents to anyone if they don't want to. It's not a duty and you don't have to perform it. I think TonyV's right though, rewarding one neice with a present because she says thank you and punishing another by not sending one is going to be awkward.