singing lessons for a 40+ tone deaf person

[wolf63]

I want to be able to sing. However I am tone deaf and must rate as the worst singer ever in Scotland. My breathing is a major problem.

Is there any hope for me? Will I ever be able to actually sing a song without murdering it?

I am going to take some singing lessons, but I need encouragement from somebody other than the teacher who will have big ��� signs in his/her eyes when they hear me sounding like a bagpipe.

Cheer me up, please.

[mycats]

Sorry wolf cant help with your question but I think you'll find I'm the worst singer in Scotland lol

[shazzzz]

meeting many scotsmen in the south east and serving them pints and hearing them sing i can honestly say you are not on your own there singing is dreadfull and why do they sing at you when they clearly no you are in disstress i thought that was why the bag pipes were invented on the other hand the irish are great singers and play the bag pipes aswell only last st patricks day i was joined by a scots man who started singing at me unawear that that he had a great big hole in the cruch of his trousers but was singing to loudly to here me telling him so my advice is save your money play the bag pipes and always check the crouch on your trousers before bursting into song if you really feel the erge to sing at a poor lass like me

[wolf63]

You were meant to be cheering me up. My brother lives in England and most certainly cannot sing.

I am a 'girl' so I never have the crotch problem, but the picture that you paint, shazzzz, is quite amusing.

mycats - maybe we can be a duet/duo. My pusscat died a couple of weeks ago. I will get another one/two soon - they can be the backing singers.

Susan

[mycats]

Sounds good to me wolf, lol I have two cats too, they can sing and dance :-)

[willa]

There is hope, Wolf, at least for your breathing. A good teacher can help you improve that (and yoga does wonders, too).

But tone deafness isn't necessarily linked to breathing. Sure, improper breathing can lead to unfocused tone that may be a bit offkey, but what kind of tone deficiencies are we talking about here? If you play a note on a piano or other instrument, can you match it (irregardless of tonal quality)? That's a different kettle o'fish. And identifying just where the deficiencies are coming from is half the battle.

But, no matter where you are on the spectrum, a good teacher can help you improve. As Joe Gideon said to the leggy but clumsy brunette in "All That Jazz": "I don't know if you can be a great dancer. I don't even know if you can be a good dancer. But I do know I can help you be a better dancer." (or something similarly inspirational)

And about those cats: there's a great Rossini duet for two sopranos, "Per Due Gatti," that should just fit the bill. They literally meow through the whole song.

[fredoregon]

Dear Susan...

O - K..., you don't seem to have had much help so far... :(
(one about cats, then crotch, the other: 'get a teacher' ...)

Let me encourage you a little bit : voice and tone are instruments, same as a piano for instance. The only difference is that the fingers are inside you... It's all a matter of neurones and synapses (our neurone's nerve endings). I'll explain...

When you first learn to ski, you have to relearn balance: you fall again and again, until by the end of the day, you realize that you can go down the sloppes goofy, but making it!

And that's because your repetitive efforts to stay up on those skies have created new synaptic connections in your brain. These are real PHYSICAL connections and grows of brain tissues !

Consequently, when you go back to the mountain the next year, while you actually think you're gonna kill yourself, you find out that it's a lot easier to ski this time around!

People who learn play a music instrument develop millions of connections at synaptic level. That's why they rarely lose their capacity to play complexe stuff, even if they take a break doing it.

These physical connections, once made (again, they are made by forcing one self to do something), have chemical and electrical signals going through them. If we stop practicing what we learned, these go dry after awhile.

However, the connections are made forever because it's flesh. So, practicing again makes the signals flow again, and that's why we are often surprised that we can do something better than we think we would after not doing it for a long time...

So, about 'tone deaf'... It is possible for some people to never be able to pitch the right note, but it's actually extremely rare. We have been made to be able to pitch. That ability is in us, it's just a matter to press on with trying over and over again.... <

[fredoregon]

(Here's the rest of my little essay, made especially for you Sue! This part is important cause I tell you what to do! :)

In that, I agree with Willa about having someone close by (not necessary paying a teacher for that) who you know has the reputation to sing on pitch. They can tell you when you're finally hitting the right notes.

You should start as Willa suggested by trying to match sound and keys on a piano (if you don't have one, get a cheap portable electronic keyboard, that'll do it)

Have someone play a note behind your back (don't cheat ! :) , then turn around and try to find it. When you think you have it, that person will confirm or correct your choice.

Do that over and over again until you can find it. Then have them play 2 notes. You will have to find what we call an interval (the space between 2 notes). This will create connections in your brain that will help you later when you try to match a tone with your own voice.

As I said earlier, you voice is an instrument, the same as a piano. It's just that the fingers for that one are the nerves and muscles inside your body, from your brain to your vocal cords.... (a bit more after that in next post :)

.

[fredoregon]

(end of it...)

It's quite an amazing and complex system when you come to think of it : a sound comes to your ear, is translated into brain waves, is identified, compared and graduated on a synaptic level scale, is volontarily sent through nerve endings to tell your vocal cords what position, strength and force to apply in order to reproduce it, while constantly relooping through your ears and your brain, and back to your vocal cords, to help you correct the pitch!

(by the way, just for that, I don't believe in evolution! Nothing that complexe and marvelous can come from chaos. And wait until you study sight!!! Darwin himself said at the end of his life that evolution implied no perfect sight at one point in time, which means that species couldn't perpetuate because the great majority of them identify what they eat to survive BY SIGHT ONLY! (study the food chain)

Anyway, the cycle necessary to reproduce a sound with the right pitch is such that it's no wonder why some people struggle with it. The instrument, as complex as it is, is there, and it's just a matter of learning it, practicing it.

There no secret about that. Only practice makes perfect.

Hope I helped a little bit.

Fredo-M.
(a frenchman, singer and pianist -who likes to study stuff-, exiled in oregon :)

[wolf63]

Fredoregon - since asking for help I have adopted a couple of cats. They sound better than me.

I think that I will take some lessons and see if there is any point in going on from there. Your 'essay' was quite inspiring.

You get bored too apparently.

So - if you are passing Vancouver tomorrow at 2pm drop in and see some of my friends

http://www.savecarsonbeckett.com/

I had almost forgotten about learning to sing, but I am glad that you had reminded me of my dream.

I used to love writing songs when I was younger and it would be nice to actually hear them sung.

Thanks for taking the time.

Susan
Scotland