Dark Past

[4getmenot]

When the killers of James Bulger were released they were given a new identity and if I'm right one of them has a child now. I'm not sure whether the mother knows his past. But if you had a child with a man then he admitted to killing a young child when he was young himself what would you do?

[rugeleyboy]

this is a toughie!!!!!

[crete]

let me think about that ?????????????????

[noxlumos]

If I reverse the question, being a man obviously I have to, and imagined that I met say Mary Bell and got together with her I'd find it difficult to say the least, but deep down I know that doing evil acts doesn't necessarily make someone evil for life. Change is possible and if that man has changed from the 10 or 11 year old that killed that poor wee mite then he'll have been experiencing guilt beyond your widlest dreams and also hopefully he'll be able to very firmly keep that atrocious act he comitted as a marker for the rest of his life and be a better person than he might have been because of that massive sense of perspective he will hopefully have gained.I'm going to stick my neck out here because it won't be a popular opinion, but I think if he's happily settled with a woman with a great enough capacity for forgiveness and understanding then that is the best thing for both he and society.Doesn't take away the horror of what he did, but it is the best possible ending for a truly tragic set of circumstances as the other options are too destructive and horrific to imagine.

[cliffsweb]

i think its difficult to ignore this, actually i think i would steer away from a murderer no matter what his age, but if i was married first and then he told me, i wouldnt know what to do, wether to say or leave, saying this they were no more than babies themselves, it was an evil act, was it a cruel game they played with him that went badly wrong, i cant think that they actually meant to kill him,. this icident touched many lives even those who didnt know jamie, i for one cried buckets when i heard it on tv and in the papers, but surely the boys who did it deserve a chance to prove they are responsible adults now.

[B00]

tis a toughy- I guess you'd have to look at what his (was one of them called John something?) motives were at the time.

I still find it incredibly hard to believe that a 10 year old deliberately set out to kill a young child. I can't remember much about the aftermath of it- was it decided whether it was deliberate? Or was it a childish prank that went horribly wrong?

[rugeleyboy]

my first answer wasnt a sarcastic remark but i genuinly feel this is a no win situation!

he is far from the person he was when he killed jamie bulger and as nox says, the amount of guilt he must have to face on a daily basis must be close to ending him over the edge?

[-Zorro-]

hang the evil pieces of sh!t

[crete]

childish pranksters dont remove a child from a shopping centre and physically abuse the child until he dies, nox i wish i had your compassion but sadly i believe these young boys were out of control that very sad day and i cant find it in my heart to make excuses for them, i do wonder though how they themselves were parented,

[redcrx]

oooh thats a tough one for a friday sis.

If my partner turned around and said he'd done something as horrific as these 2 boys did to James then I would expect myself to get up, pick up our son and walk away. Id rather put up with the heartache of losing the person i loved (who really wouldnt be the same in my eyes anyway) that risk my son either being hurt directly or suffering in the future for what his dad had done.

So, obviously im not a forgiving person :)

[4getmenot]

But rugely shouldn�t he deserve to be living with guilt for the rest of his life? I have no idea what I�d do because people can change a lot, but when a child is involved it is so difficult. I guess its one of those don�t know till you�re in that situation type questions. And zorro yes that what we all thought at the time I�m sure, but unfortunately they were set free.

[crete]

O M G 4get, have you been on the wine,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,3 stars im truly honoured. good question makes a change !!!!!!!!!

[4getmenot]

Actually I posted that before my sis had put hers and she�s made my mind up just mentioning my nephew, if she did find that out I�d want her to take him far away from him aswell.

[noxlumos]

I certainly haven't made excuses for them Crete, in any shape or form. What they did was inexcuseable and evil, pure and simple. I do however know from first hand experience that people can change and do, very dramatically. You either have to accept that this man has changed and therefore is fit to be a parent himself or you have to view him as a danger still in which case he should be locked up.It's a horrible situation as one's natural revulsion at a child who can kill a younger child so horrifically almost fights down one's instinct to understand that the perpetrator was only a child himself and is now a man who in all probability resembles his former self not a jot.

[crete]

how do you know he does not resemble himself now nox, i think this is what we would like to believe.

[4getmenot]

I think you�ll find I always post a good question crete :)

[crete]

4 get. its coming into panto season............. oh no you dont.

[noxlumos]

I did not say he DOESN'T, I said he PROBABLY doesn't. How many of us have not evolved since we were ten Crete?
I did terrible things in my teens and twenties, but I'd never dream of doing them now, people change and evolve away from evil and visciousnes if they have support and a good solid partner, that's why I think if he's been freed, having a partner and family are the best possible things for society, as it'll draw him away from the negatives in his life.I have not excused or sympathised with him in any shape or form,his crime was appalling, but I do understand the nature of positive evolvement as I've mentored and employed a lot of ex offenders.

[4getmenot]

I definately have, in fact I think I've got worse :-)