What would you say about this??X

[trevross-GGG]

Hey all!! I abit confuzzelled,i been with my boyfriend for quite a while now and there is something that is always always on my mind and wont go away. I love him with all my heart and i know he wouldnt hurt me in any way, couldnt live my life with out him....lol theres a but,!! we were kinda seeing each other, but then we had quite a big fall out, cut a long story short, he was all about his friends, everything revolved aound his freinds, he had this girl best mate which i didnt mind her but she got involved to much and would text him 24/7,when we were at the cinema's, on holidays..in bed and he would just happlily tetx her back which i thought was weird especially during romantic times. So we had a break for 3months,,in that 3months i found out he had a one night stand which i totally have got over as, firstly he told me himself about it and secondly he had cried with guilt to me over that,! but there is this one girl, who i know, its his best mates nieces she is same age as him,i found out that he went over to her house and watched a dvd in her room on her bed but he insisted he didnt to anything not even kiss and that they just watched a film together,his mates used to joke that they were husband and wife and that they looked good in pcitures and that they suited well. Im finding it hard to get that last little bit out of my head as she still texts him now about general things and jokes but i just cant help thinkning more happened that night even know he is insisting nothing did??..What would you think and how would you get over it?? advice ould be great!!XX

[happyone2]

All of us in the same situation im sure, would try and convince ourselves that there was not something going on............... we would hope that dispite the fact we cant let it go and keep chewing over it like an old bone, we are being silly and there is nothing going on.

BUT, on some level of course there is, they may not have actually "done anything" but they are connected in some way that makes them not able to not have contact..................... even when he is romatically involved with you............

and much as you probably dont want to accept it, do you want to have your mans loyalty's divided between you and someone else who he cares for in a way that trascends what he can share with you ie a physical relationship

you may continue with it , but i would say , in my opinion, however much good you get out of the relationship it is forever tarnished and is therefore of less value now you know about this situation - and could affect your self esteem etc etc in the future.

go on with doubt or do what you need to do to enable you to love someone who loves you totally, utterly completely...............

[trevross-GGG]

i totally understand where your commig from with the connections, but what if she is really one of his friends who he feels he can confide into.
When we first got together he would have a texts from 4 different girls on his fone which he classed as 'friends' but gradually in our relationships he has lost conact with some of them but its her which he still talks too.

What wories me is that me and him were 'friends' and thats how we met, we go talking and meeting up and now were an item and i wouldnt change the past in any way, but its just so hard to forget about that silly night were he claims 'nothing happened'.

ahhh! :( x

[Silvercat]

Id say that your gut instinct is telling you that you are not happy with the relationship as it is with this female friend of his being so invasive.
My advice is tell him its all or nothing and if he is unable to relegate this girl to the same status as his male friends there is no hope for you and him.
It will hurt like hell for a while but believe me you will survive and be glad you did it.
Who knows he might see sense at last.
Good luck whatever happens

[lil75]

It sounds like you sharing your relationship with other women, personally I wouldnt like it and it would make me feel bad inside....If you want him to understand the way your feeling, tell him, if that doesnt work and it still carries on, get your mates to text you when you are with him and make out its a few blokes you know...I bet he wont like that...I know its game playing but sometimes, you have to do it to make them understand and appreciate what they have got...x

[onlyme26]

hello, i know exactly how you feel!! i have had sort of the same thing going on in my head!!!

you need to think about it this way,,, no matter what he did or didnt do, you were split up, he hasnt cheated, and i know it niggles away at you and its soooooooooo annoying!

maybe ask her some how??? do you know her at all? or better still someone that knows her??

or just ask him, have a heart to heart and tell him you still love him no matter what he tells you, you understand you were split up and you arent going to shout or be angry and maybe he will confide in you , may even bring you closer!
xx

[trevross-GGG]

Thanks everyone, all that advice has been taken in


XXX