The run up to xmas

[WILLWONKER]

So whos looking forward to the next few weeks leading up to the grand day?
well this is what you will be hearing. First off it will be on your local news ther will be a shortage of sprouts, so what? then they will show you the council jobsworth in his yellow mac telling us all thats theres no shortage of salt and grit for our roads, because we did'nt bother putting any down last year, and if the public don't scream at us to much this year we won't bother again, besides we've got the grit but not the hundred grand waggons, so you will just have to say bye to your no claims bonus.Xmas trees very few and expensive ,thats because nobody wants em, turkeys well they tell you the same old story in short supply, thats just to get you to run out and order one, so they know how many to order, or the ones that are in short supply are them from M&S, around the £80 mark that are still on the shelf xmas eve, and so they should be. Now if we have that first shot of snow, well what can i say, the four wheel driver will be trying to show us all how to drive in the snow looking at us as if we;ve only just past our test, halfords will have sold out of de-icer, so everbody is going frantic trying to get some, but don't worry its no bloody good anyway it froths up and disapears, you may as well drop your pants and wee on the screen, and theres always that big smash up on the motorway, and several folk die due to that idiot raceing to the other halfords for his de-icer, or he/she as heard that asda have still got some sprouts left. Oh and three days before your local council will let you know that council tax will be going up next year, they always leave till then because they hope you are to rushed off your feet and so happy that Xmas is here to take any notice. ( wrong). I,m not going to get into energy companies, but there is one thats promised us all that they won't but there prices up till january WOW great, thats only because they are hoping to nick some customers from the others over the next few weeks then slam you with a bigger rise. And if your in the RAC or AA and your unlucky to break down, then best of luck because if theres only half inch of snow you will be told a 5 hour wait if your lucky, and this is after you've been jumped on and drove up the wall by them every time you've entered a shopping centre. any way have a good one. Happy Jack.

[T&S]

Jeez....having a bad day Ebeneezer?

[Kiki-frog]

If there's a shortage of sprouts, then bring it on! Can't wait!

[dotty.]

loads of de-icer everywhere it's anti-freeze i can't find

[AliceTickband]

so when is Christmas again?

[chaptazbru]

Not looking forward to it at all then WILL ???

[craft1948]

I've already ordered my sprouts................

[missnemesis]

♫ There goes Mr Humbug, there goes Mr Grim ♫

[mazie]

I've already got my sprouts on !

[owdhamer]

Should we cancel ?

[chaptazbru]

You're like me then maizie, likes her sprouts well done !!

[craft1948]

Good thinking Mazie...........were you a girl guide?

[mazie]

No craft, I was in the Woodcraft

[craft1948]

Is that like Wicca?

[vodkancoke]

Bah humbug and all that! I love every minute of Christmas, it can't come soon enough for me. :)

[mazie]

My Mum found out it was for young communists and wouldn't let me go again :o(

[tonyav]

Jaysus, it's gonna be a bit windy in some houses over Christmas !

[albaqwerty]

I thought the sprouts were used for a bung,our kid.

[craft1948]

I'm not allowed out if there's ice about (SmartCars are NOT good on ice) and I'm not having turkey. I'm already with the company who are increasing fuel prices in January, so I've no worries...............

[tonyav]

Yep ah wench, they are.

[tonyav]

Smart cars aint no good on any surface.