Is age 5 too young

[factor-fiction]

http://uk.lifestyle.y...to-become-a-girl.html

"Zach Avery was three when he started questioning his gender, and began wearing dresses and ribbons in his hair."

Is it too young or were the family and medical experts right to take action at such an early stage?

[pa___ul3]

I admire the parents' and school's approach of letting him be who he wants to be right now and just trying to get the other kids to accept that. In an ideal world that would be the norm, although we know it's not so he will, at least, grow up to be very thick skinned whether it be as a man or a woman.
I hope this case opens people's eyes about GID.

[sp1814]

d9f1c7

I agree with you that at 5, a child should have no concept of gender GID, and this child *doesn't*. In his mind (I'll use the male pronoun for simplicity) he's a girl. Also, this has been going on for a couple of years now. He may very well grow out of it, and he may not.

To OG's point "He'd be better helped by being guided to accept who he is" - aye, but there's the rub...it's possible that who 'he' is...is a little girl, born into the wrong physical body.

It's a real phychological minefield, this one - extremely easy to get it wrong, no matter which way you go with his upbringing.

[sp1814]

Incidentally, if I were his parent, I would ensure he was introduced to as many 'boys' toys/activities as well as 'girls' and 'gender neutral' toys (such as Lego). If he decided that he wanted to be a boy after all, then all well and good. If his wish was to remain being treated as a girl, then he is very lucky to be surrounded by the family has has, and go to the school he attends.

How he'll survive his teenage years however, is another matter.

[d9f1c7]

Thanks AOG as I have said on other threads, left wing bigotry is far more savage than anything that is generally called thus.

[jno]

d9f does have one fair point to make: why is this in the news?

jno jnr had no gender identity problems, thank heavens; if he had had, we would have dealt with it as best we could, quite possibly in the same way as in this story.

The one thing we would never have done is go to the media about it. There might be something to be said for telling the press about the experience, as a guide to others who might have the same problem, but it would only have been anonymously. No names, no photos. I don't know why they did that.

But the suggestion that it is all some sort of plan to make themselves media stars is bizarre.

[anotheoldgit]

Like I said, i can't see a child of three, asking his mum to go and get him a dress so that he can act out being girl.

It won't be the first or last time that a mother wished that her child had be born of a different sex, and because of this started dressing and treating the child in such a way as to try and bring this about.

[Canary42]

In response to the disbelief expressed that the parents could have fabricated/encouraged this merely to get publicity, I suggest you research "Münchausen syndrome by proxy".

[China Doll]

I agree that it is not news jno. Or at least not the kind where the childs name and photo is published. That to me is indicative of something not quite right rather than the actual child thinking (and possibly being at some sort of genetic level) he is a girl.

[jno]

you don't think that will have been considered already, Canary?

[rowanwitch]

This is a child who has tried to cut his own penis off... A pretty clear statement he is uncomfortable in his body if the actions taken help him cope good.. he wears trousers to school not a skirt... compromises ... until he is of an age to make the final decision....

[Haggisdj]

On a more practicle note, what about using toilets at school, PE, etc.? And don't you think the child may suffer at the hands of other children... they can be very cruel?

[rowanwitch]

They have made the toilets gender neutral

[B00]

Jno's made the point I was about too.

Why would any self respecting parent splash this "story" all over the newspapers? Fast buck maybe?

No matter which gender this child wishes to grow up, I can only imagine the profound embarrassment this story will be to him or her as a teen or older.

[starone]

When I was young children were kept in dresses for a very long time, probably until three. My mother said the gypsies would steal them if they knew they were boys but they didn't bother if they thought they were girls. Load of rubbish of course, and I didn't believe it (honestly). My grandson wanted a teaset for his birthday when he was four and don't they all play with dolls in the shape of Superman, Spiderman and the rest. Their sexuality will arrive all too soon. Let them be children first.

[d9f1c7]

The awful thing is that this child will be mercilessly bullied for at least his early life, all because attention seeking parents want their 15 minutes. Call the social services this is the sort of thing they are for.

[flip_flop]

Is age 5 too young? - Yes.

"Their sexuality will arrive all too soon. Let them be children first."

I could not agree with you more Starbuckone.

[B00]

Think calling the SS is a bit (read a lot) extreme. I'd rather they did their job of these kinds of cases more efficiently!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Baby_P

[jackthehat]

I don't know quite 'how' the story broke, perhaps the parents felt obliged to co-operate with its publication?

As Rowan says, the fact that the child is attempting to self-harm by doing away with that part of his anatomy he views as 'alien' has left his parents and child specialists with the view that it is better to 'go along' with things for now where any given situation will be salvageable in the future rather than force the child into seeing that drastic action is the only solution?

[factor-fiction]

Thanks for all the responses. I am still undecided on this and I am puzzled as to why the story with photos has been made available to the press.