ChatterBank0 min ago
Observations on growing older
~Your kids are becoming you... And you don't like them... But your grandchildren are perfect!
~Going out is good... Coming home is better!
~When people say you look "Great"... They add "for your age!"
~When you needed the discount, you paid full price. Now you get discounts on everything...Movies, hotels, flights, but you're too tired to use them.
~You forget names... But it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!!!
~The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15
And you have a better chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.
~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything... Especially golf.
~Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.
~The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do,
But you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.
~Your spouse sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than he or she does in bed. It's called their "pre-sleep".
~Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"?
Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!
~You used to say, "I hope my kids GET married... Now, "I hope they STAY married!"
~You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch...
~When GOOGLE, ipod, email, modem... Were unheard of, and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.
~You tend to use more 4 letter words... "what?"... "when?"... ???
~Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.
~Your husband/wife has a night out with the guys or gals but is home by 9:00 P.M.
Next week it will be 8:30 P.M.
~You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.
~Notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!
~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.
~Everybody whispers.
~Now that your spouse has retired... You'd give anything if he/she would find a job!
~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet... 2 of which you will never wear.
But old is good in some things: Old songs, Old movies, And best of all, OLD FRIENDS!!!
~Going out is good... Coming home is better!
~When people say you look "Great"... They add "for your age!"
~When you needed the discount, you paid full price. Now you get discounts on everything...Movies, hotels, flights, but you're too tired to use them.
~You forget names... But it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!!!
~The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15
And you have a better chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.
~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything... Especially golf.
~Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.
~The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do,
But you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.
~Your spouse sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than he or she does in bed. It's called their "pre-sleep".
~Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"?
Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!
~You used to say, "I hope my kids GET married... Now, "I hope they STAY married!"
~You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch...
~When GOOGLE, ipod, email, modem... Were unheard of, and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.
~You tend to use more 4 letter words... "what?"... "when?"... ???
~Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.
~Your husband/wife has a night out with the guys or gals but is home by 9:00 P.M.
Next week it will be 8:30 P.M.
~You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.
~Notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!
~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.
~Everybody whispers.
~Now that your spouse has retired... You'd give anything if he/she would find a job!
~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet... 2 of which you will never wear.
But old is good in some things: Old songs, Old movies, And best of all, OLD FRIENDS!!!
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