ChatterBank1 min ago
Divorce - 10 years separation or not?
My husband left the marital home 10 years ago to live with another woman. He has lived with her monday to Friday and returns home every weekend. We have been working on repairing our marriage with the intention of being together at some point in the future. We have holidays together and socialise as we always have done. He has now decided that he wants a divorce as his future lies with the other woman. I dont want a divorce.
Does this count as a 10 year separation?
What happens if he serves me divorce papers and its something I do not want?
Does this count as a 10 year separation?
What happens if he serves me divorce papers and its something I do not want?
Answers
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No best answer has yet been selected by wendy56. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.from what I recall (no doubt there are others more qualified to answer this) Grounds for divorce on separation are 2 years by consent or 5 years without consent.
This means that if your husband has left the marital home and let you know his plans, where he's living etc then after 2 years this can be grounds for divorce. Or if just dissapears without any communication then after 5 years you can apply for divorce.
I'm not sure how his coming back weekends affects this.
This means that if your husband has left the marital home and let you know his plans, where he's living etc then after 2 years this can be grounds for divorce. Or if just dissapears without any communication then after 5 years you can apply for divorce.
I'm not sure how his coming back weekends affects this.
when he's home at weekends, do you live as husband and wife? From the socialising together etc it sounds as though you do (i.e. do you share food/the entire house etc). in which case, then there is no separation, as for 5 years separation to stand, it has to be complete separation, not just living apart Monday to Friday.
Its quite surprising that you are happy for the situation to go on as it has been for 10 years though. Are you not angry at your husband for using both you and this other woman for such a long time? Do you honestly believe that your marriage can be reconciled? If so, then perhaps its time to consider mediation. I wish you all the best with it.
Its quite surprising that you are happy for the situation to go on as it has been for 10 years though. Are you not angry at your husband for using both you and this other woman for such a long time? Do you honestly believe that your marriage can be reconciled? If so, then perhaps its time to consider mediation. I wish you all the best with it.
I don't think you are legally separated, assuming you are living as husband and wife at weekends. If he files for divorce on the ground of 5 years separation you can defend it on the basis of the actual situation & his petition would then hopefully be thrown out by the Court. However, he might petition on other grounds - such as unreasonable behaviour on your part - & what you do then will depend on what he puts in the petition.
Of course, all of this is unlikely to make your relationship with him any better - very probably will make it much worse - so you need to think before going down this route whether it is really the best thing for you to do.
Of course, all of this is unlikely to make your relationship with him any better - very probably will make it much worse - so you need to think before going down this route whether it is really the best thing for you to do.
I agree with themas - apart from the fact that he WILL be able to get a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences. That is almost impossible to defend since if he says the marriage has irretrievably broken down and refuses to be reconciled, that's it. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but in such cases defending it will lead to more costs and more heartache and it is simply delaying the inevitable.
Barmaid
Given that you're a barrister I hesitate to question your post, but my understanding is that the law stipulates that the marriage has to have irretrievably broken down, as evidenced by one of five things:
1. 5 years separation
2. 2 years separation with consent of the other party
3. Adultery
4. Unreasonable behaviour of the other party
5. Desertion
In wendy's case it seems only 4 might be possible.
Given that you're a barrister I hesitate to question your post, but my understanding is that the law stipulates that the marriage has to have irretrievably broken down, as evidenced by one of five things:
1. 5 years separation
2. 2 years separation with consent of the other party
3. Adultery
4. Unreasonable behaviour of the other party
5. Desertion
In wendy's case it seems only 4 might be possible.